Whoa!
Parker! I'm not filming yet.
Could you just wait a minute?
- Okay. - You said that was the last one.
Okay, we'll make it really quick this time.
This is the third video today. I missed soccer practice.
Okay. Look, you do this once more,
and I promise you that I will buy you a brand new Neymar jersey.
- Okay? - I'm a Mbappe fan.
Okay. Now when you open the box I need you to get really excited,
like, like at Christmas time when Grandma buys you something that you don't like.
Okay. Here we go. And... action!
So, Parker, what have you got there?
It's... It's a box, but... I don't know what's in it.
Well, open it, silly.
- Whoa! - We got a mystery package today,
which we're really excited about.
It's the first official package that we've been sent, which is a big deal.
We're really starting to get noticed, huh, Parker?
Whoa! Seriously. Mom, I got a tablet!
Oh, my God! What?
I got a tablet!
Oh, my gosh. Wow.
Okay. Um... How? Oh...
- Let me try. - Can you turn it on?
This tablet is your official life-changing invitation
to the SoShal Mansion.
As a social media expert, I built my empire with the Look Loop platform.
And now, I wanna help you do the same.
Compete with five other influencers in brand-building competitions
designed to bulk up audience engagement.
And, as I use my period's blood
to nourish this plant, which in turn cleanses the air that we all breathe,
I reflect on our interconnectedness,
which is something that no amount of money can buy.
All right...
So, today's look is called "Fool's Gold",
cuz this fool is going for gold at the SoShal Mansion, baby.
Follow, like, and subscribe, bitch.
So this social media expert reaches out to me and he was like,
"I'd love to leverage your expertise."
He keeps giving me his pitch. Blah, blah, blah.
And I'm like, baby, the best Ax$el is a grease Ax$el.
Ax$el Mega is your boy.
Ladies, weights won't bulk you up. They'll build you up.
Tell your friends to follow me and do all the things
that help me to help more of you.
No reps, no respect.
[Sofia] Leave your personal devices behind and use only your gifted tablets.
[phone] I'm not enough screen for you anymore?
- Wow. - [Phone] You said size didn't matter!
It doesn't matter.
It does.
- [phone] What does it have that I don't? - Better resolution.
[Sofia] It'll take all your blood...
I am the plant, and you are the pulsing bloodline.
Sweat...
I'm pumped to win this thing.
And tears.
Girl! I'm so excited I could cry.
Whoever gains the most followers, wins.
You go out into the world and you find your light, baby.
And leaves here with $1 for every new follower.
You wanna make money? You came to the right guy.
Spots are limited. You are not. All you have to do is show up.
- Whoa. - Parker, get the suitcase.
Hey, it's your boy Ax$el coming at you from the SoShal Mansion.
And here's some of the other influencers coming up behind me,
much like they will be in the competition.
Hi, what's your name?
Hey, hey, hey! I'm Mimi.
Wait, do you have service here?
It's a video. I'm gonna post it later-gator.
[Ami] Bye.
And you are?
Peach. Like the fruit.
That makes sense.
Yo, what's up, buddy? I'm Kyle. Hey, guys.
I look forward to crushing your boy out the competition.
I'm just joshing, bro. What's your name?
Enchanté! Ax$el Mega.
And you are?
Gaia! Oh, my gosh. Hi! I'm Julie. This is my son, Parker.
Parker, tell Gaia how much we love her guided meditations.
She makes me do them before bed.
Oh, well, that's...
- I'm sorry, he's just tired. - Wonderful.
It's been such a long trip.
Ax$el! Hi!
I love your content on growth, through real estate investment.
I feel like we could learn so much about branding from you.
Hi, Brandy.
What's your name, little guy?
- Hey. - This is Parker,
and he unboxes gifts and he showcases his shopping hauls.
Say, Parker, how old are you? Twenty? Twenty-five?
- No, I'm... - He's ten.
Say hi to his followers.
Hi, I'm Parker.
Hey! Are you ready to grab 'em by the p
- by, by the... by the pigtails? - Yeah, you bet.
All right.
Isn't he cool? What a cool guy.
Oh, don't forget to follow Parker, and subscribe!
Sweetie, it's branding. We just spoke about it.
With respect, I would downward your dog any day.
Namaste.
[Julie] Thanks, so much. You're such a gentleman.
Oh, my God! Mimi? Girl, I love your posts.
They make me piss myself laughing.
Well, thanks and "pee's" d to meet you!
Mimi is my character. I'm Ami. And you're @PrettylnPeachMUA, right?
Stop it. Stop it.
Your contour lessons changed the game for me.
- Oh, stop. - Helped me carve out a chin.
It's so crazy seeing you in real life. Like, you're a real person?
Of course I am.
Jai Bhagwan. I'm Gaia.
Selfie?
- Come on. - Okay, yes.
Mm, grace.
- Girl, she looks so familiar. - Mm.
She went viral for using her period blood to feed her plants.
- Great. - I know.
Wait for me, coach. I'm coming.
[Peach] My God, look at this place! We're not in Kansas anymore.
Does anybody actually live here? How do they get food?
Well, sweetie, if you have enough money,
you can get whatever you want, even in the middle of nowhere.
[Kyle] And they have money.
[Axel] This dude is excelling, man.
I think it's a woman. I mean, that's what I got from watching the video.
I banged enough models to know one when I see one, Glasses.
She was clearly hired by tech bro.
Whose name they probs gotta keep under lockdown for security reasons.
It's what you gotta do when you get to this level, bro.
[Sofia] Dear guests, it is my honor to welcome you
to the SoShal Mansion.
Please explore the grounds, as they will soon become your tomb-home.
Soon become our what?
I think she said "home".
Make yourselves comfortable, but don't get too friendly.
Only one person can leave here
a winner.
All right, let's go.
- Come on! - Yeah.
[Gaia] It's so empty in here.
It feels like a model home.
Mmm. It looked better in the photos.
Girl, everything looks better in photos.
Guys, it's an influencer house. It's supposed to look curated.
I actually think it's really impressive.
Hell, yeah. Guys, train your mind to see
to see the good in every situation.
Yeah!
You got it. Yeah, we got it.
So, where is this chick? Is she gonna show herself, or what?
Sounds pretty bang able.
I'm bored. Everyone here is so...
Successful?
Old.
Shh.
Just... Let's take a look around. Just come on.
Hey! Yo, bro.
Listen, um, what are you thinking you wanna do about the chick situation?
Got my eye on the hippie one.
Seems like a bit of a feminist, but I could wear her down.
That leaves you with the glasses one. And, cool for you?
I'm here to focus on the endgame, bro. I don't need the distraction.
- Fucking helps me focus, bro. - Good for you, pal.
Yeah, yeah.
Love!
Hello?
Anybody here?
A donde esta el WiFi password?
Oh.
Hey!
Peed a little.
- Sorry. Float like a butterfly. - Mm-hm.
What's the point in being able to make videos if we can't post them?
Maybe it's only she can control what we put out there, and when?
- Okay, but I'm literally dying for WiFi. - I know!
- This "no service" thing stresses me out. - Yeah.
Um, do you think it's weird about the kid?
I mean, who brings a kid to a mystery mansion?
Yeah, it sucks. He's definitely gonna win.
- He's so cute. - Hate him.
Word.
- [Kyle] Oh, yeah. Love me some catering. - [Julie] This is incredible.
- Oh! - [Kyle] Super.
It's fine.
[Julie] I love that somebody is cooking for me tonight.
Oh, my God, look at this.
- [Julie] Oh my gosh! So exciting. - [Kyle] This looks good, huh?
Hey, bro. Your spot's down here.
- Cheers, bro. - Yeah, sure.
- Thank you, brother. - Take your hat off.
- [Axel] This is nice, huh? - [Gaia] Hmm.
Ooh, it smells like truffle oil.
Oh, yeah?
It's just like the stuff you make on Tuesdays. From the blue box.
It's obviously much higher quality than that. Take a... Take a bite.
So... Where's our host?
Anyone else curious about where this food just, like, magicked from?
A little paranoid there, huh, bro?
My mom told me not to take food from strangers.
[Kyle] I'm pretty confident that they didn't go to all this trouble.
Bring us here just to kill us.
At least not on the first night.
[Kyle] I tried to cheers her, and she said no.
So, how many followers you all have on Look Loop?
Parker's got 250k. He's been working really hard. Haven't you, buddy?
- [Ami] Wow. - Nice, bro.
I'm at 250, also.
- Word! Same. - I am too.
Right on. Makes sense, though, right? Keep it a fair fight.
So, Gaia, I noticed your accent got thicker than the last time I saw you.
On behalf of female pleasure everywhere, -Mm?
I pray that you got thicker than the last time I saw you.
You two know each other?
Uh, we met once at a convention.
- We met more than once at that convention. - Briefly.
Kyle, I am a big fan of your workouts.
I used to do them almost every day after my divorce.
Really helped keep me motivated to stay moving.
- Good, I'm glad. I appreciate that. - Yeah.
Uh, she didn't really do them. She mostly just watched you do them.
Parker!
By the way, how do you get those lines on your stomach?
- I think he means your six-pack. - Oh.
Well, it's a lot of hard work. You gotta eat the right food.
And, you know, I always say you can fake a lot of things,
but you can't fake fitness.
- So true! - You're a real fan.
Well, you know, no reps, no respect.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
Actually, sometimes you can fake fitness. Drugs, surgery...
I'm sure nobody here does that, though.
And you, Gaia, what's your secret? You literally glow.
I've always been super into wellness.
I quit high school and moved to India,
and absolutely soaked up everything that I could,
and I brought that back to my daily life.
And... I guess that manifests as glow.
- Wow. - Yeah.
Gosh. Yeah. I mean, I've tried the wellness thing.
It's just... It's really tough as you get older.
It is.
Especially with kids. I mean, I haven't even worn makeup in years.
No, but you're beautiful, though. You don't need makeup.
Oh, my God. You're one of those guys.
Look, Julie, I'm just gonna be honest with you.
Um, guys kinda like chicks who look after themselves.
I mean, maybe you'd still be married if you didn't let yourself go.
Well... you're a prick.
Well, as the resident expert on the subject, nobody needs makeup.
It's to show the world what you see when you look at yourself.
You're beautiful, Julie.
So... you see circus clown?
Do you know what it takes?
The balls it takes to look like this where I come from?
- Do you? - The balls?
No, you don't.
You have no idea what it means to fight just to be yourself in this world.
I see a warrior.
To answer your question.
Can we reset?
- Yeah. - Yeah.
Let's take a video.
That's a great idea. More content showing keeps our accounts growing.
- Yeah. - Right, sweetheart?
- Glasses up, gang. - All right.
[Gaia] Woohoo.
A toast... To our fellow inhabitants and our followers.
A life is not important except for its impact on other lives.
Cheers to that.
- Cheers, Ax$el, on me! - Cheers.
God, you're so young, yet so wise.
You're also quoting Jackie Robinson. I didn't realize you were a baseball fan.
I'm not quoting anyone. That's what I believe.
And so I thought it and I said it.
- Oh, jeez. - Oh!
What is that sound? How do you turn it off?
Oh, it's the legal. It's starting, guys. See, bro? I told you it was legit.
- It's so long. - Yeah, that's what she said.
- Nice. - Wait, you've signed it already?
It's just the standard terms and conditions. Really don't need to read it.
Girl, I feel like you kinda need to read it.
Could you read it to us? She's got a crazy hot accent.
Trust me, it's just a bunch of liability stuff that all platforms use.
There, done!
- [Kyle] Let the games begin, gang. - [Ax$el] All right.
Ami?
Oh, shit! I knew there was something in this wine.
- Mom? Mom, what's happening? - It's not the wine.
I need some air.
Just connect to your breath.
Yeah, let's breathe outside.
- Should we call someone? - Call who? We have no service.
Meet Mimi.
I, um, I have these panic attacks
when, um, I haven't logged in to Look Loop in a while.
I just start freaking out, you know?
About, like, what if my followers have forgotten about me?
Or, um, what if my follower count has gone down?
- I know, I know it sounds crazy. - No, no, no, it doesn't.
It doesn't. I get it.
For me, it's like, what if something happened and I missed it?
- Like a booty smack in your DMs? - Drop on in.
[Ami] Yeah.
I remember when this massive shooting happened in Texas.
It was all over the news. Everybody was talking about it.
God bless America.
My dad had forced me to go on this, uh
man-making camping trip and wouldn't let me take my phone.
So when I got back and checked my Look Loop,
there were all these comments saying, "Why aren't you talking about this?
Why aren't you using your platform? Don't you care?"
So, ever since then, I'm constantly checking,
making sure nobody's in my comments,
trying to take me down for not posting about something.
Yeah.
I knew it.
Is everybody okay?
- Yeah, yeah. - Oh, yeah.
I just had a mo. I'm feeling better.
Well, that's great news. Cuz we just got another message on our new tabs.
- Ooh. - Got our first challenge, people.
- [Ami] Yes! - [Peach] Yeah.
All right.
"Whether it's real or fake, authenticity sells.
For this challenge, you need to show your followers who you really are.
You'll find the greenroom stocked with props.
Let your influencer husband know when you're ready to rock."
- Let's fucking go. - [Julie] Yeah.
- [Kyle] Yeah. - What the hell's an influencer husband?
It's the person that records all your footage.
It's basically like a personal photographer.
Oh, my God! Why they gotta make it sound so gay?
I mean, "queer".
- Okay, let's just. - [Parker] Uh, guys...
Oh, shit.
- [Julie] Oh? - [Peach] What the hell?
[Ami] So, are they the influencer husbands?
Hey, are you all right, little man?
Yeah. There's a lady on the TV.
She's asking for you.
- [Peach] What? - [Ami] Okay.
- Thank you. - Sure.
What?
- Don't ruin your makeup. - Oh!
Wow. Jesus.
- Yeah, go and fuck yourself. - Oh!
Relax, honeydew. It was a joke.
Mom, I don't like this.
Sweetie, it's a game. It's meant to be fun. Don't worry.
Where's that lady you were talking about, little dude?
Oh, she's... Wait, what?
She was there a minute ago.
Okay.
Welcome, everyone. I'm Sofia, your guide through this competition.
Jesus, maybe she's more of a hand model.
Now you're all here because you are amongst
the fastest-rising influencers in your fields.
Gone are the days when you had 1000 followers,
and thought you were hot shit.
If I only had 1000 followers, I think I'd kill myself.
The ring lights have activated, which means you're now
in your best light for your first challenge.
Oh, God. It's happening.
You have five minutes to grab your props from the greenroom.
You have one minute to record your content.
Once the last influencer is finished, all your videos will be posted in unison.
Wait... no editing?
We can still use a filter, right?
Whoo-hoo! Let's fucking do this.
[Ax$el] All right, all right!
- [Ax$el] Let's go! - Hey! One team, one dream, baby.
You grab me some weights while I warm up. Yeah? Okay.
So... you ready to be authentic?
I'm authentically gonna puke.
My whole account is "Mimi" bits.
Why don't you just be Ami?
Because I want people to like me?
Girl... you want me to glam you?
Me?
You'll feel like the best version of yourself.
God, yes. Anything.
Make me worthy.
I mean, like, who even is that social media guru, right?
If she's famous, how come none of us have heard of her?
Maybe she did well on Wikifeet?
I know I've heard her voice somewhere...
Maybe Super Soul Sundays? Perchance she was interviewed by Oprah?
Pfft, there's no way.
Ugh, can you please go and spittle in your own corner.
All right, here I go. Wish me luck.
Hard pass.
I used to get made fun of a lot in school.
It was rough. I don't like to talk about it.
But here we go.
I was the kid eating lunch in bathroom stalls to avoid the bullies.
Girls... hated me. They called me "chicken legs".
And then I found the gym and it gave me the strength that I needed to fight back.
And that's all that I want for all of you.
Bro, you had like 20 seconds left.
Oh? Yeah! No, I'd said everything I needed to say, though.
Couldn't do any more reps, could ya?
- No. - Yeah, good chat.
Asshole.
Now, I keep telling you my system works, but this is next level.
You all know I've been asked here to help some influencers with their growth,
but... check this out.
There's this huge party outside, right?
I mean more hot chicks than I've seen in my whole life.
I mean, I've bagged two of them, man. I've been juiced of all my sauce.
You know what I'm saying? I've got a chick on my face. One on my...
- Dick. - Word.
Okay, so, I'm gonna ask you questions
and you're gonna be really cute and funny, right?
Yeah.
And the purpose of today's challenge is to be?
Real?
Parker, I need you to stop answering with a question.
You know this.
Real.
You don't wanna disappoint the nice lady who bought you here, do you?
She didn't seem that nice.
Let's go, okay?
Man, that's bullshit. I ran out of time.
Hey, watch your mouth... the kid.
Oh, oh, oh. Oh shit.
You know, you'd probably have a lot more followers if you led with this.
And did you know there's a 30% increase in follower retention rate
for chicks with fake tiddies.
Something to think about, sweet cheeks.
- I actively hate that guy. - Same.
It's not that I don't trust you. It's just, I trust myself more, so.
I'm just... Oh!
Right.
Lighten up, Jules.
I'm sure you'll do great.
Say hi to your Parkies.
Hi, Parkies.
And tell your friends what you're gonna be doing today.
We're telling the truth?
Oh, I mean, we're telling the truth.
Hm.
And what's one thing that would surprise everyone to know about you?
Parker.
I don't wanna say it.
Parker... you can say anything to your fans.
They'll support you.
But you're gonna be mad.
Sweetie...
I would never be mad at you for telling the truth.
Say something... Now.
Uh, I don't wanna be here.
Wait, what? Uh...
In this house?
- No, no. - It's a really, really cool house.
No. No, I mean...
An influencer person.
What?
I told you I wanna play for the soccer team, but I missed the try-outs
- because you made me record videos. - Oh, my God.
Parker, I get that you feel that way right now,
but you'll thank me when you see how many doors this opens for you.
No! No, that doesn't count. Delete that.
Why would you say that?
You said to tell the truth.
We need to talk. Right now.
- The mum spills bad vibes. - [Ax$el] Yeah.
What do you think happens to you when you get older?
Your voice changes. You start sprouting pubescent hair on your upper lip.
We learned about it in health class, but I didn't really...
All the people that follow us... they go away.
They find a younger, cuter kid. And all of this is over.
This was our last chance. And you just fucking blew it.
Siuuu.
We've done it, y'all.
[Ax$el] Oh, yeah baby!
First challenge done, dusted, and posted.
Did I sound calm enough, though? I feel I was talking too fast.
Yeah? I feel great. I feel like I really connected with people.
Sure you did, guy.
Maybe it was a bad idea not to do Mimi?
I mean, there's already so many pretty girl accounts out there.
- Oh, Ami... - Shit! Fuck.
Oh, Jesus!
- Not the face. - Sorry.
You can get this back when you start taking things seriously.
Excuse me, um, if it's posted can we just go see our comments?
I just wanna see what's going on.
Yes!
- [Ax$el] Yeah! Show time. - [Kyle] Yeah, let's go.
- [Kyle] Yeah, let's do it. - All right.
Uh, guys.
Look at these numbers!
Do you see this shit!
Holy mackerel. Four thousand new followers! Oh, my God.
"He's the cutest. I love that he feels like he can be honest with his mom!
"I'd watch him play soccer!" That's my baby!
Aren't you concerned at all about... edophiles-pay?
Pedophiles.
Oh, don't be jealous, Gaia. It's just a game.
How'd you do, coach?
Oh, yeah. Great, great, yeah. Good comments. They, uh...
Wait, is your follower account decreasing?
[Peach] All right. That is bullshit.
Fourth? Do you know what? It's okay. It ain't over 'til it's over.
What the fuck? I'm only third. Come on!
There's always room for growth, right?
Have you tried fake tiddies?
[Sofia] The analytics are in and the winner is clear! Congratulations Parker!
What does he win?
[Sofia] Well, he's still in the game.
And I think you will find that will become
very important in a moment.
Here you go. You go play until the next round.
You can't win them all.
[Sofia] Kyle, as our loser,
please let your hubby guide you to a second location,
where you will record your exit video.
Oh, what? It's been, like, three minutes. You can't judge me based on that.
Actually, the first three minutes of a post's existence
are indicative of its lifetime performance.
She's so wise.
Train your mind to see the good in every situation.
Dude, obviously they were gonna let the kid win. It's fucking bullshit, dude.
A treadmill, bro? Cardio's not my brand, but whatever.
[Sofia] Kyle, we hope you have enjoyed your time at the SoShal Mansion.
Yeah, whatever.
[Sofia] You still matter. Just not enough.
Please record your exit video for your followers.
Hey, Pump Power family,
- unfortunately, I've been eliminated... - I wish he'd take his shirt off for this.
Oh, my God. I would smear that on a cracker.
Uh-huh.
Nah.
No reps, no respect.
Okay, I can get off now, bro.
[Sofia] Not so fast...
Release the Kraken.
[Kyle] Huh? What are you doing?
[electronic voice] " This dude was the most popular guy in our school."
"No one made fun of him."
"But we literally had an orgy with Kyle in the science..."
Are they blasting his negative comments?
That is my own personal hell.
- Girl, I never read the comments. - Hm.
Bro, what are you doing, buddy?
Try slowing it down. Don't speed it up.
Hey! Hey, buddy!
What are you doing, bro?
Treadmill fail. Treadmill fail, huh!
[electronic voice] " His diet plan gave me an eating disorder."
[Ax$el] Treadmill fail! Treadmill fail!
- Oh, my God. - Whoops.
Are those... real spikes?
Dude! What the fuck. Guys! Guys, I don't fucking run this fast.
I'm not a cardio guy.
- Please! Let me off! - Press the off button!
It's fucking disabled!
Guys! Help me, Ami!
I can't run this fucking... Fuck. Guys, please!
What's going on?
Oh, God! Guys, help!
[Ax$el] Oh, God!
[electronic voice] "More like a big fail influencer."
"Unfollow."
What the holy shit?
Where the fuck did she go?
Okay. Okay, maybe it's a prank.
- Right? Right? It could be all for show. - No, no, no.
That shit was real.
All right. Everyone stay calm. Let's not forget to breathe.
You joking! We just saw a guy get killed right in front of us.
So this was the plan? To kill us all off?
[Peach] Oh, my God.
Well, not... Not all of us.
Only one person can leave here
a winner.
Yes...
Parker! Shouldn't you go find your kid?
- Fuck, yes! - Uh, meet us at the front door.
- Let's get the fuck outta here. - Let's go.
[Ax$el] Let's get the fuck outta here.
Parker!
Parker?
Parker!
- Are you okay? - Yeah.
You're acting weird.
Are you still mad at me for not wanting to be an influencer?
No.
I mean, it's still something that we can talk about.
But, no, I'm not mad at you.
Um. Does...
Does that me we could leave?
[Peach] Shit.
They're not gonna let us go.
[Gaia] Of course they're not gonna fucking let us go.
What a stupid thing to say.
We're in the middle of nowhere. No service, no phones.
It's now or we'll never see the light of day again.
All right, let's do this.
Okay.
[Ami] Wait!
What happens if we leave here?
What?
I mean, they have access to our accounts, right?
What happens to those?
Oh, my God.
She'll delete them.
Mom...
I... I said, does that mean we can leave?
Mom.
Mom?
Not yet.
Okay.
Baby, I'm gonna need you to put on your game face, okay?
Because you have... no idea how important this is.
If you can do that for me, just... Just one more time.
Okay, Mom. One last time.
- One last time. - Okay!
He's fine. He's kicking his ball around. He has no idea what's going on.
And I don't wanna scare him until we come up with a plan.
So, in summary, if we stay and play,
one of us gets to live.
But the rest of us die. And if we leave, they delete our accounts.
But we have the chance of making it!
And risk dying of thirst on the way back.
Tough call.
Speaking of thirst, I need a fucking drink.
Me too.
Guys...
So this was a trap all along.
Oh, poor Kyle.
Let's come up with a plan before it's poor all of us.
[Gaia] We've already established that we can't leave.
Well, let's think about what we can do.
We can play.
I meant what I said earlier.
If I only had 1000 followers again, I... I really think I would kill myself.
Promise?
- I know you feel the same way. - No, she doesn't.
Right?
Well...
Are you telling me, a stranger dropping LMAO and a laugh emoji
in your comments section is worth dying for?
I'm telling you that it fixes that broken part of me just long enough
that I don't jump off a fucking cliff.
So I guess...
Yes.
[Ax$el] Yeah? Why not?
Those are real people behind those little floaty likes.
You'd be a fucking liar to say it don't tickle your balls
- to have that many people pay attention. - I don't need attention that bad.
Oh, yeah? Sure, right! You're a real fucking wallflower.
All right, fine. I don't fucking hate it, but it's not my reason to live.
Earth, Wind and Fire, you fucking back me up here.
I worked for the biggest marketing firm in America.
I was an intern for 80 hours a week.
See!
I earned minimum wage.
And while my bosses got rich off my ideas,
I barely survived off 50 cent ramen packages
and no-name brand SSRIs.
- Well, you can get a different job. - She can't. She's got no other skills.
- She's a yoga guru. - Oh, please!
She couldn't tell her spleen from her asshole.
Have you even been to India?
Oh, fuck you, Julie! You bank off your kid being cute, but you know what?
Puberty's a bitch and time's ticking.
Are you willing to give your kid up as collateral for a bit of fame, Julie?
Forbes ranks Ryan Kaji as one of the highest-paid stars in the world.
He started as an unboxing kid, just like Parker.
Wow! Was he also offered an all-expenses-paid trip to a murder house?
I like our odds.
You can go... I'm staying.
You're serious?
As a panic attack.
[Ax$el] Peach, get off your high horse.
You keep saying we're crazy for staying, but I don't see you trying to leave.
All right. Game on.
[Sofia] Oh, dear! One of you has been misbehaving.
I thought we had thoroughly screened all of you for potential misconduct,
but it appears we have let one through the cracks.
One of you has inflated your profile
with bots!
What? Don't look at me.
[Sofia] As per the terms of your agreement,
a bot discovery results in an automatic elimination.
Don't you touch him.
Please... Please it's not his fault.
I'm the one... I'm the one that bought him the fake followers.
- It's not his fault. - [Parker] Mommy!
- Oh, my God! - [Parker] Mommy!
Parker! Nooo!
No! No, stop!
Get away from him!
No!
No! Nooo!
Stop!
[Sofia] Parker! I'm so sorry to see you go, sweet boy.
You still matter. Just not enough.
If only we had a second unboxing kid to unbox the first one.
Who do you think that's for?
Julie, as part of Parker's team, you too have been
eliminated.
- [Julie] No! - Makes sense to me.
No! No! No! No!
No!
[Sofia] But, lucky for you, I found a loophole.
Parker's account got so many real followers after his post,
that I decided to offer you the chance
to be the creator on his account.
Let's face it. You were always the mastermind
behind his image, anyway.
So, what's it gonna be, Julie?
Join your son Parker, or stay and play?
Time's up.
No! No! No! No!
I'll play, I'll play, I'll play, I'll play.
[Sofia] Good choice.
I'm gonna take care of this bitch once and for all.
Hey! Show yourself!
Please? Your ladyship ma'am.
Oh, this should be good.
Okay. Look... Listen, um...
You're a business woman, and... as a business man I appreciate you.
And from one business man to another business m-pers... Uh, lady,
I, um...
I think... respectfully, of course, I...
I think you're wrong about wanting to keep Julie, you know?
I just don't think it's what his target market wants to see.
And you've got four remaining players who are, like, super competitive.
So I don't think we need to dilute the pot with the mom, you know?
I mean, I...
That's what I think about what you did to that poor kid.
I mean, children are the fucking future, man!
What...
[Sofia] Time for our next challenge.
It's the holy grail
brand partnerships.
[Ami] Where are they?
- What? - My pills. My pills.
My pills!
[Sofia] Now we're upping the ante...
This challenge is live.
As soon as your ring light turns on,
you have one minute to sell, sell, sell.
Now...
Who looks ready?
Ami...
You're up.
- Why me? No, I... I'm not... - Ami! Ami, Ami, Ami, stay calm.
Hey, you sell that piece of shit like your life depends on it, right?
You got this. You got this.
[Sofia] In three, two, one...
Um, hi guys.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'm here. I'm just...
Let me introduce you to my new friend.
Uh...
Hi! My name is,
uh, Sofia.
And... if you don't buy me, I'm gonna kill Ami.
Oh, please don't! I'll buy ten of you!
And so will you, right guys?
Oh! No, no, no.
I'm still funny. I'm still funny. I...
I'm just in this competition, and, um...
Um...
Look, here's the deal. Okay?
I... I promise.
I promise to go back to Mimi if you promise to follow me.
I'll do whatever you want. If you leave, I die, okay?
She's killing us.
No! No, I'm not. I'm not a scream queen.
This is real, I swear.
- Ami! - She fucking killed a kid.
And she'll kill me too if you don't...
Holy fucking shit, man!
Om sarve bhavantu sukhinah sarve santu...
[Sofia] As per the terms of your agreement,
your participation here is bound by a non-disclosure clause.
In other words...
Snitches get stitches.
You fucker, you...
- You fucked with her pills. - What are you paranoiding about?
- You fucked with her pills. - Get off my face, man!
[Sofia] Julie! You're our next contestant on the Price is Yikes.
And let's hide those comments, shall we? Ami says they're a distraction.
Um...
I'm... I'm so... I'm so sorry, Parker.
I... I knew that you didn't want to be an influencer.
I did what I thought was right for you.
But it was what was right for me and I was so wrong.
And it's too late.
It's too late
because you can never get those years back.
As a child.
But I know now that you're free.
From this and from me.
I wish I'd been a better mother.
So...
I'm gonna continue this account
instead.
For the enjoyment of all the families
who loved
love... Parker.
So please buy this air fryer.
It's non-stick.
[Ax$el] What the hell?
[Sofia] It's that time again.
[Ax$el] Oh, my God.
[Sofia] One of you has got to go.
The good news is you've all made it to over 300 000 followers.
The bad news is...
One of you will only enjoy your new balloon for a few minutes.
It appears a dark horse has entered the race.
We have a clear winner.
Please let me be dark enough to be the horse.
Congratulations...
Julie.
Peach, you attempt to sell anti-aging moisturizer was undermined
by your comment that "black don't crack".
No, no, no, no. I panicked. I'd never do a brand partnership as a live.
It's not fair.
[Sofia] It would appear you are a bottom after all.
Oh, no, no, no... No... Please!
- What about Ami? - He's right.
We've already lost a player this round.
Shut up!
It would be a shame to waste the balloon.
So, as a reward for reaching this milestone...
I get to leave? No harm, no foul?
You may enjoy your shiny balloon a few minutes longer.
See you in the next round.
Give me the fucking balloon.
That sack of silicone thinks she's gonna break me,
but I've got fire now, baby. I'm ignited.
Oh, yeah, you're an absolute vol-gay no.
Every creature is beautiful, but that face is a lot.
That's pretty judgy coming from you, Miss Mother Nature.
Girl, nothing about that mug is natural.
I keep telling you guys. She's just a dumb-assed model
that's been hired by the real puppet master.
But Sofia said she built her empire on the Look Loop platform.
I don't know guys. I know all the big Look Loop players.
So, what? We're supposed to know her?
Look, if she's that big a deal, I probably banged her.
Unless she used to look different.
That voice.
That turtleneck!
Oh, my God!
All right, my little chicken nuggets.
Who's ready for the next challenge? Are you excited?
What? Like we have a choice?
[Sofia] Oh, but you do.
Cuz you have chosen time and time again to participate.
To engage and play the social media game.
You create your own content, your own opportunities...
Speaking of creating, Sofia...
Where's your sister, Shalin?
[Peach] Who?
Shit.
Oh hell, no.
This is a club I do not wanna be in.
Where are the hubbies going? What's happening?
She did not like you calling her out like that.
Good. We can use that.
Use that to what?
To find whatever room those two psychopaths are hiding in.
Wait... There's more than one?
And our facelift friend... is the reasonable half.
How did she know?
What you mean, "How'd she know?"
You did that shit to your face but you're still wearing a turtleneck.
- This is my trademark. - You wore it to all our press conferences.
Having a uniform minimizes decision-making and maximizes productivity.
You're not Steve Jobs, you loser.
Also, calling it the SoShal Mansion? A bit on the nose.
Oh! Okay, well. Forgive me, I thought it might be "fun" to have a ship name.
Sue me!
- I need a flashlight and a weapon. - [Ax$el] I'm confused.
- Oh, wow. What a shocker. - Fuck you, puffball.
Look, you guys can stand here like a bunch of fucking dildos,
but I'm gonna go and find those two nutjobs and take them down.
Girl, count me in. I am not a dildo.
It's too fucking dangerous.
The lights are out. The hubbies have scattered.
This might be the only chance to turn the tables.
Gaia, let's hunt some hoes.
Please stay.
I'm really scared and... I don't know what to do.
Don't worry, Mama. I'll protect you.
They must be here somewhere.
Gaia, hold up. Who's Shalin?
She is one half of the deadly duo who brought us Look Loop.
The face and her sister created Look Loop?
How did you not recognize that episode of Botched right away?
Because the last time I saw her she hadn't yet Franken-fucked her face.
You saw her? In the flesh? Or whatever that is.
I worked for the ad company that had their account.
I poured their goddam coffee.
Sofia was all about creative direction and Shalin built the program.
It was the perfect yin and yang.
What was the creative direction? Murder, but make it fashion?
Believe it or not, it was to unite people.
Fine. I went too far. So how do we fix it?
Look, there's nothing to fix. They're here, aren't they?
Yeah, I guess that's true.
Yeah. But... I mean, if you're worried,
let's kill 'em all now. What's the difference?
The difference is that if we kill them we're just a couple of bitter psychos.
Correct. What's the problem?
The problem is that we're trying to make a point.
What's the point we're trying to make?
That it's the platform that is killing them.
Their followers decide who lives and who dies, not us.
- But it is us! - No, it's... It's the hubbies.
That we hired.
Who represent the followers. It's a metaphor!
Oh, my God. You failed English.
Wait...
So, if they own Look Loop... why would they wanna kill us?
Aren't we kinda good for business?
They don't own it anymore.
They got into a massive fight with the suits.
The investors wanted to make the platform
as addictive as possible to maximize profits.
Sofia and Shalin were creators, not lawyers.
They got tricked into signing away their ownership rights.
Always read the fine print, Gaia.
Money or values. Can't have both.
Anyway, what I don't understand is how hurting us
is somehow getting back at the investors?
Without influencers there's no engagement.
Without engagement, there's no money. Without money...
The investors get screwed.
God, I feel so safe with you.
I know.
You're the smartest one here.
I could tell that from the first video that you posted.
Yeah... totally.
I was so glad when you joined the competition.
I was, like, this...
This isn't an ordinary, boring, mid-life mom. I mean...
This is a MILF. You know?
- An asset. - Yeah.
You're making moms feel like they matter. It's so smart to capitalize on that.
You know what I mean.
God, it's been... so stressful.
- Being at the top... - Mm-hm.
Scared of falling down the ladder at any time.
I wish there was a way that we could fight this thing together.
Imagine what our follower account would be.
Oh, wait. Wait, okay, I've got an idea. Hear me out, okay?
We annihilate Peaches and Cream.
Those two losers have been at the bottom of this competition the entire time,
- and then... - Yes?
We'll unite our accounts.
One brand.
One motherfucking empire.
I thought you liked my idea.
Of killing people and making Look Loop pay? Big fan.
No! The bigger picture.
Of showing the world that social media is addictive, and it's poison,
and it ruins lives.
Honestly, I could take it or leave it.
They're poisoning Look Loop from the inside out.
And they're killing us to do it.
Any chance we can reason with them?
I was in the room the day they found out they were getting kicked out.
You owe me.
[Gaia] SoShal lost their Soshit.
It was one of the worst things I'd ever seen.
Sofia screamed at the CEO,
and Shalin took down two security guards
with an office chair before accidentally taking out her own sister's face.
So, no. I don't think reason is going to work.
I mean...
I guess it can work.
- Oh, yeah. Hm-hm. - I was on Parker's account.
If... If we both win, we can share the profits, huh?
- [Julie] Mm-hm. - [Ax$el] All right.
You really are a grower.
There's only two things in this world that can make me hard.
Money... and MILFs.
And Cialis.
Hey, look.
[Gaia] Shh.
You said you'd do anything to make it up to me.
Fine. We'll do it your way.
Open it. Open it.
Now, get your skinny white ass out of the way.
Do it!
Shitball motherfucker.
Oh, my God, you fucking bitches.
I can't fucking believe you put me in here!
We could have a car line. Partner with Rolls Royce.
Or a minivan line.
Make soccer drop-off sexy again.
[Gaia] You fucking two-faced bitches.
[Sofia] Shalin!
You owe me.
[Gaia] Crazy bitch...
Fine... Fine, let's just start the game again before something goes wrong,
but if things get out of hand we do it my way. I will not let this platform
fuck me over twice! I get the last laugh this time.
Um, we?
We! That's what I... Isn't that what I? That's what I said.
- Does mommy want a penthouse in Dubai? - Mommy wants a diamond butt plug.
- Say my name. - Oh, Ax$el.
- Say my whole fucking name. - Oh, Ax$el Mega!
[Gaia] Come on, you fucking bitches...
I can't fucking stand you...
Please! Please, please, please.
Please, please. My skin can barely handle laser hair removal.
[Sofia] Please return to the lounge for your next challenge.
So... we don't speak the Queen's English?
I mean... technically I did grow up on an Island.
Only... the island was off the coast of Georgia.
And the guru shit?
What do you think? This was for some
lifelong longing for enlightenment?
Namas-no?
Do you know what the top Google searches are for women age 30 to 45?
No, but you're gonna tell me.
Butt-lifting yoga pants and Bali meditation retreats,
and I wanted to get out of the rat race, and so...
Guru Gaia was born.
Please don't tell anyone cuz I won't get out of here alive.
Hey. I got you.
Thank you.
Anyway, it doesn't matter. We didn't find anything.
Well, that might not be true. What if we can divide the sisters?
- Unbalance their yin and yang? - Yeah.
As one waxes, the other wanes.
- Find their cracks. - Drive them apart.
- Keep our lives. - And our followers.
- You're a fucking genius. - I know.
Oh, hey.
Did you find anything?
Not really. You?
I got what I needed.
[Sofia] Well, don't just stand there.
Say hello to Shalin! My sister and partner in crime.
Crime's right.
[Shalin] Get that thing off me.
Unlike the rest of us narcissists, Shalin is camera-shy.
- Shal. - Ow!
Don't be an old man. Say hi.
No! I'm busy.
Making a slick little sizzle reel of all our rejects final horrific moments
so that we can put them on the winner's account.
Jesus, that's revolting.
Which will be swimming in views after it's posted. You're welcome.
Ladies... I have to say...
I was such a big fan of your work.
Do you remember me from Boombridge Marketing?
I'm Katie Briggs.
I worked on your account.
Pretty ballsy using your own platform to destroy itself.
[Shalin] Well, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em.
Enough. Okay, it's been too long since you last posted.
What is it you always say, Julie? New content showing...
Uh, keeps your account growing.
Truer words.
Guru Gaia, seeing as you cracked our secret identity,
it's time for us to crack you.
What... What do I have to do?
Your next post will be "Motivational Monday".
You have one minute to record brand new content.
- And no pressure, but you're live... - [Gaia] Wait! No, no!
- In three, two, one. - No! Oh, my God. No, no, no.
No, no, no...
Yeah.
To... To earn the rainbow
you must endure the rain.
Dammit, she's good.
- [Gaia] Joy feels sweeter when... - How she come up with this stuff?
Life is a battlefield...
- You've got to fight... - I know this.
[Gaia] Death might be easy, but bitch...
Hey.
That shit's just the start.
Motivational, you dumb bitch.
Uh, screams in the alley, echoes of despair.
In this ruthless game, life ain't fair.
Blood-stained memories...
[Ax$el] Blood-stained memories, etched in my mind.
[both] Gotta play the part,
leave your values behind.
'Lil Pussy Lick didn't die
in no gang war so you could rip off his lyrics you fake-ass bitch!
Have you been taking credit for other people's wisdom this entire time?
No.
[Ax$el] Hey, everybody! Here's a little song I wrote.
I wrote it myself. I swear to God.
I hope you like it.
O say can you see...
[Ax$el] Oh, shit!
Unite the Right in your own content, motherfucker.
Fake news!
And that is why, ladies and gentlemen, it is the best idea if you're 100% authentic.
- This is a loser. This is fake... - You're learning from a broke-ass...
So this is a song that I sang
uh... sing to Parker,
to remind him that he is not alone.
And that he has the support of God, and of all of you.
Oh? We're bringing God into this, Julie? She won't like that.
He's got the whole world...
You wouldn't know a vagina if it smacked you in the face.
World in His hands.
[Julie] He's got the whole world...
This goes to everyone who thought I couldn't do this,
and everyone who thought I could.
[Julie] ...my whole world in your hands.
So follow, like, subscribe.
[Peach] This little light of mine, -[Julie] He's got the whole...
- I'm gonna let it shine. - In His hands...
- Is that even your face? - You are a fucking loser...
Wha-Wha-Wha.
-Contoured face of mine, -He's got the whole world...
I'm gonna let it shine.
- You leak-ass bitch... - Motherfucker...
Hater's gonna hate,
- They'll try and ruin your fate. - [Ax$el] Get some, bitch.
But you just shine, you just shine, you just shine.
Kill you!
You just shine, you find your light.
And you just shine.
Grab the platinum lube, baby. Your diamond butt plug is on its way.
[Sofia] Cultural Appropriation Barbie, the tribe has spoken.
You still matter, just not enough.
No that's not fair! Ax$el sabotaged her.
[Ax$el] Life is a bitch, and that bitch is a fraud.
Peach, you win this thing. As one waxes, the other one wanes.
Divide and conquer, Peach.
Gaia!
[electronic voice] " What kind of freak uses period blood for anything?"
"She can go back to nature for all I care."
"I'm so done taking life advice from her."
"Any asshole can stretch and spout bullshit."
"She puts the ho in homie."
"Anyone else find it unsettling that she
from various cultures without genuine understanding or respect?"
"Knowing one Hindu prayer does not make you... a yoga teacher."
"I guess she forgot to manifest in a British accent."
"I taught yoga for years and she is not the real thing."
"She's barely out of diapers."
"Anyone else offended that everything she says and does comes from other cultures?"
It was an honest white woman's mistake.
[Sofia] I invite you to bow and give gratitude to your mind, body and breath.
For taking you through your practice and the rest of your
eternity.
Namas-toodles.
[electronic voice] " Unfollow."
Whoa! Well, I don't know about you guys, but I feel right refreshed
after this iron boost.
Vitamin G drip, anyone?
Peach... you're looking a little pale.
Yeah, I'll stick to blush and a good night's sleep.
[Sofia] Your next challenge is all about your peers.
We no longer look outwards to the followers, but inwards,
for the support of your fellow influencers.
Community is crucial to your survival.
♪ Influencer community. ♪One love.
What about all we've built? That doesn't matter anymore?
Oh, stop acting like this was never just all about you.
[Sofia] There are three of you left. Who should stay? Who should go?
Cast your votes and tell your followers why you made your choice.
You give men a bad name.
Go and fuck yourself.
Fermentation only makes two things, fine wine and vinegar.
You know your boy only drinks the finest Dom Pérignon.
This Peach has gone rancid.
I've really got a... pit in my stomach about this.
It's always amazed me how the world overlooks us
moms.
We're the queens of creation.
And I'm one powerful mom
because I can bring life into this world and I can take it out.
We banged. I mean, we connected.
And banged!
You think that's the first orgasm I've faked?
You two-faced breeder. We made a pact.
We were gonna start an empire together.
Oh Ax$el, I can buy my own diamonds.
[Ax$el] We could've had a future together!
You used sex against me.
A woman using sex as a weapon is sexism.
You're a sexist.
Thanks for the ride.
I'll take it from here.
You're nothing without Ax$el Mega!
[Sofia] Ax$el, have you ever had an endoscopy?
They stick one pipe down your throat and another up your ass,
and blow from both ends.
It's hilarious if it's not happening to you.
No! No!
[electronic voice] "...no child support. All this guy wants to buy is friends."
No, stop, stop! That's never gonna fit in there.
Exit only, man! That's exit fucking only!
The dildo of consequence rarely comes lubed.
[electronic voice] "His worldview is narrow-minded
and fails to acknowledge the complexities of society..."
Relax your throat.
[electronic voice] "...potentially harmful,
promoting manipulation and exploitation."
[Sofia] Let's be honest, what man doesn't want a killer blow job?
[electronic voice] "Unfollow."
And then there were two.
It's not too late.
We can overpower them and still leave.
Leave for what? I have nothing else left, do you?
I'll take that as a "no".
I'm really glad it's you and me.
You'll be so easy to beat.
Congratulations to both of you!
Now, this final challenge has been specifically chosen
to capitalize on how damn likeable you both are.
If you play this one right, you'll be swimming in followers
and drowning in empathy likes.
I'm already reaching for the tissues.
Get ready to... apologize.
What are you doing?
Trust me. I'll take it from here.
[Peach] Wait. Why should I say sorry? I haven't done anything wrong.
Well, that's not my fault.
What are you doing?
Crying makes my eyes look really pretty.
How's it possible that you bring your kid here against his will and become a hero?
I do nothing wrong and risk going down for it?
I don't make the fucking rules.
5Your kid is gone.
Which makes it that much easier
to apologize to him and actually fucking mean it.
- Jesus, that is dark. - That's survival.
Being a piece of shit mother and apologizing for it,
that's my brand now.
And you know what? People eat that shit up.
Because they need to feel better than someone else.
- And you're that someone else. - Guilty as charged.
You should've tried harder to play the game.
I have spent my whole life trying to play other people's games.
Trying to fit in, tone it down.
Be a man.
As a kid, that little boy that I used to be...
I made him small.
I dimmed my light.
And it worked.
People liked me a lot more but I liked myself a lot less.
I wish I was kinder to that little boy.
He had every right to be here and to be loved.
I'm done playing other people's games.
So, you're not gonna apologize.
Girl, fuck no.
God, I love being the smartest person in the room.
Julie and Peach.
Not quite the apology video I was expecting, but hey.
It's your content.
What?
Wait, uh, were you live-streaming that entire time?
Well, the lights were on, weren't they?
Wait, I... I'm sorry. I, I...
I'm so sorry. Fuck. I'm so sorry.
[Julie] Oh, my God. Fuck!
Oh, Jesus.
No, I will not lose! I will not lose! I will not lose this game!
Oh, my God, I win?
I win!
Oh, God!
[Sofia] It sure seems that way, doesn't it?
What's the catch?
[Sofia] No catch.
Only one of you can leave here... a winner.
Okay, well, keep your crown. I'll see myself out.
Not so fast.
Oh shit. What now?
There are two of you left.
Knowing the two of you, that can't be a dance party.
Not today.
Parker.
Oh, my God. Parker! Parker!
He... He's okay?
Oh, he's more than okay.
He's a kid again.
He hasn't seen any of it.
No.
We gave him his childhood back.
You see, Parker said he didn't want to be an influencer,
and because, technically,
he didn't make his own choice to sign up for social media,
I said we should let him live.
And leave his fate up to our victor.
So there's a catch.
Busted!
All right, here's the deal.
We've made an epic, blockbuster kill reel
of all the social media induced deaths that have occurred here,
but we need one more.
You volunteering?
Well, you're our victor, so you get to choose.
Let him go free and we will record your act of mercy.
Or?
You get to leave.
At the cost of one child.
Jesus, you'd murder a ten-year-old?
Oh, technically you would murder a ten-year-old.
But he would go easy. See all the pipes in the wall?
We would just turn on the gas and let him fall into a sweet dream,
where his mom never died.
And the world never went to shit.
So, what'll it be?
You or him?
- Please... - Think about it.
- Please. - Have a look. Little guy.
No! No! Get the fuck off me, please!
- Get the fuck off of me. - Okay, fuck off of him.
Relax.
All right, Parker it is. Roll camera. Turn on the gas.
Kids are so curious. Don't go to the light, Parker!
Good choice, by the way. Yours was gonna sting a little.
Oh, oh, oh! There he goes.
It won't be long now, Peach.
Little curious little cat.
There he goes.
- No, no, no, no. - Oh, oh.
[Peach] I choose Parker. Let him go.
Get him the fuck out of there.
Parker!
Come on, come on. Oh, God! Oh, God!
Come on, come on, come on.
Come on... Come on.
Oh, thank God. Thank God.
Hey.
What?
I spent so much time looking at you through my screen.
I almost forgot you were real.
[Peach] Of course I am.
We all were.
Okay, guys, cut this out. Let's finish this, huh?
No. No!
[Peach] What?
You're gonna drown me?
As far as your kills go, this one lacks pizzazz.
Okay, not quite. What we did was, we rigged it so when we pulled that lever
the pool turns into a giant electrical surge and cooks you to death.
What was your catchphrase again? "Go sparkle and shine."
Get off me.
Are you turned on?
No! No!
I wish I could get wet that fast.
You want me to do a Get-Ready-With-Me in here?
But you've fucking ruined my hair?!
It's a little bait for the electricity.
Yeah, I don't think that's how electrical currents work.
Oh, shut up! Science makes me sweaty.
Sofia!
Peach! During your time at the SoShal Mansion,
you have won the hearts of your followers.
Unfortunately for you, your heart is weak.
And you sacrificed yourself to save a lame little boy,
who will have absolutely no idea what you did for him.
As per the terms and conditions of your contract,
which you signed and agreed to,
only one influencer can leave here
a winner.
As my spiteful sister and I know all too well,
read your contracts, kids, because the world's ready to fuck ya in every hole.
Peach!
You matter, just not enough.
Wait, stop! Stop!
That is not my signature.
Excuse me?
I didn't sign that. Gaia signed it for me.
Wait. So...
So you never agreed to the terms and conditions of participation?
I'm here against my will.
Oh, nooo!
- Okay, don't glitch. - But it was all so perfect!
Sofia... Sofia!
No!
Flick the thing.
Fuck.
Calm your tits! Calm your tits. No, what are you doing?
- Get him out of the pool. - No!
Do not get him out of the pool. Sofia, finish this.
But he never agreed to be here, Shalin. He shouldn't have seen any of this.
You know what? Fuck you and your rules.
If you want things done right, you gotta do them yourself.
Corner kick!
Siuuu!
[Sofia] Let go of me!
He wasn't supposed to be here!
Get out!
You run like Messi, okay?
For the last time, I'm a Mbappe fan.
Go!
You've ruined it for me!
You've made me a laughing stock again.
Oh, you're the laughing stock? I look like this!
So let me fix it for you.
Hey, ladies!
My catchphrase is "Go and find your light."
[Shalin] Nooo!
Hey! Parker.
Wait up.
Where's my mom?
I'll explain later.
Wait.
You've done enough unboxing for one lifetime.
If it's another tablet they could keep it.
Yeah. I think I'll take a break from the socials.
Take up a less dangerous hobby like skydiving head-first into a gator pond.
That's funny, though.
What?
I bet your new followers would love to see you do that.
You must have so many after this. Even millions.
Hey, you coming?
Yeah.
So, uh, you've got somewhere to go, right?
Yeah, I want to go to my aunt's.
She stays on a dairy farm. I don't even think she has a dial-up there.
Sounds like the perfect place to be a normal ten-year-old.
My mom lied. I'm actually 14.