0 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:15,000 1 00:01:41,134 --> 00:01:43,734 First position. Second position. 2 00:01:44,337 --> 00:01:46,092 Third position. 3 00:01:46,172 --> 00:01:48,161 Fourth position, open. 4 00:01:48,241 --> 00:01:49,941 Fourth position, closed. 5 00:01:50,577 --> 00:01:51,965 Very good, Dick. 6 00:01:52,045 --> 00:01:55,502 You'll be doing multiple double tours in no time. 7 00:01:55,582 --> 00:01:58,238 Gosh, Bruce, kids don't ballet dance. 8 00:01:58,318 --> 00:02:02,175 I mean, I feel ridiculous in these tights. 9 00:02:02,255 --> 00:02:06,913 The discipline of ballet promotes balance, flexibility and strength, 10 00:02:06,993 --> 00:02:11,317 all useful things in our never-ending fight against crime. 11 00:02:11,397 --> 00:02:14,020 Gee willikers, I never thought of it that way. 12 00:02:14,100 --> 00:02:16,456 Now, that's enough practice for one night. 13 00:02:16,536 --> 00:02:18,258 Gotham Palace is on, 14 00:02:18,338 --> 00:02:22,595 and even crime fighters need mindless entertainment sometimes. 15 00:02:22,675 --> 00:02:25,142 Gosh, yes! It's my favorite show. 16 00:02:27,614 --> 00:02:30,837 ANNOUNCER: Welcome to everyone's favorite variety show, 17 00:02:30,917 --> 00:02:32,939 the Gotham Palace. 18 00:02:33,019 --> 00:02:38,611 And here's your host, that international starlet of stage and screen, 19 00:02:38,691 --> 00:02:42,015 Miranda Monroe. 20 00:02:42,095 --> 00:02:45,518 Thank you. (CHUCKLES) Thank you. 21 00:02:45,598 --> 00:02:49,556 On tonight's show, we have those singing sensations, 22 00:02:49,636 --> 00:02:52,025 the mop tops with the mostest, 23 00:02:52,105 --> 00:02:54,972 Hector and the Ho Daddies. 24 00:02:56,276 --> 00:02:57,842 (CROWD CHEERING) 25 00:03:01,881 --> 00:03:05,449 (PLAYING OFF-KEY) 26 00:03:06,552 --> 00:03:07,985 (CROWD GROANING) 27 00:03:12,558 --> 00:03:13,546 (GASPS) 28 00:03:13,626 --> 00:03:14,792 (ALL GASP) 29 00:03:15,795 --> 00:03:17,584 Those aren't the Ho Daddies. 30 00:03:17,664 --> 00:03:21,721 No, it's that mocking mountebank of malice, the Joker. 31 00:03:21,801 --> 00:03:24,224 Oh, sorry, kitties, 32 00:03:24,304 --> 00:03:28,428 but the Ho Daddies have decided to play a smaller venue, 33 00:03:28,508 --> 00:03:31,231 the broom closet backstage. 34 00:03:31,311 --> 00:03:34,734 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 35 00:03:34,814 --> 00:03:36,936 Bruce, look! 36 00:03:37,016 --> 00:03:39,706 It's that black-hearted bearer of a billion bumbershoots, the Penguin. 37 00:03:39,786 --> 00:03:42,375 Careful, you pre-pubescent pipsqueaks, 38 00:03:42,455 --> 00:03:44,777 or I'll give you a taste of my Penguin umbrella. 39 00:03:44,857 --> 00:03:46,026 (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 40 00:03:46,126 --> 00:03:49,082 And the prince of perverted puzzles, the Riddler. 41 00:03:49,162 --> 00:03:53,186 Riddle me this. What kind of band doesn't play music? 42 00:03:53,266 --> 00:03:56,022 Answer. A band of thieves. 43 00:03:56,102 --> 00:03:58,191 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 44 00:03:58,271 --> 00:04:01,072 And of course, that dominatrix of deviltry... 45 00:04:02,175 --> 00:04:04,964 Catwoman needs no introduction. 46 00:04:05,044 --> 00:04:06,866 Holy unholy alliance. 47 00:04:06,946 --> 00:04:09,535 Our greatest foes have reunited. 48 00:04:09,615 --> 00:04:12,616 Quick, gang, we have to hold these creepy crooks for the cops. 49 00:04:19,792 --> 00:04:21,025 (ALL GASP) 50 00:04:22,862 --> 00:04:24,762 (SIREN WAILING) 51 00:04:25,998 --> 00:04:29,956 I do love a captive audience, but we must be going. 52 00:04:30,036 --> 00:04:32,325 Let us away, let us away. 53 00:04:32,405 --> 00:04:34,772 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 54 00:04:40,213 --> 00:04:41,645 (MUFFLED EXCLAIMING) 55 00:04:48,054 --> 00:04:49,153 (WHIMPERING) 56 00:04:53,726 --> 00:04:55,493 It's the Bat-Signal, sir. 57 00:04:57,430 --> 00:05:01,821 Yes, Alfred, no doubt the Commissioner is already calling. 58 00:05:01,901 --> 00:05:04,991 Oh! (CHUCKLING) Mercy alive. 59 00:05:05,071 --> 00:05:09,006 Why, you'd think you were Batman and Robin, rushing out like that. 60 00:05:10,943 --> 00:05:14,100 We were just going fishing, Aunt Harriet. 61 00:05:14,180 --> 00:05:17,804 (CHUCKLES) At this hour? Land's sake! 62 00:05:17,884 --> 00:05:20,139 You two sure do fish a lot. 63 00:05:20,219 --> 00:05:22,375 We find it's a great way to relax 64 00:05:22,455 --> 00:05:25,812 from the pressures of being a millionaire playboy and his teenage ward. 65 00:05:25,892 --> 00:05:30,483 Indeed. Now, if you'll excuse us, Aunt Harriet. 66 00:05:30,563 --> 00:05:35,388 Can you believe the lengths those two go to keep their little secret? 67 00:05:35,468 --> 00:05:37,957 - Secret, ma'am? - Why, Alfred! 68 00:05:38,037 --> 00:05:40,193 You really don't see it? 69 00:05:40,273 --> 00:05:41,494 No, I do not. 70 00:05:41,574 --> 00:05:45,365 Now, if you'll excuse me, I believe the upstairs doorknobs need polishing. 71 00:05:45,445 --> 00:05:46,844 Good day, madam. 72 00:05:49,949 --> 00:05:52,016 (PHONE BEEPING) 73 00:05:53,886 --> 00:05:55,508 No need to explain, Commissioner. 74 00:05:55,588 --> 00:05:57,543 We saw the whole sordid affair. 75 00:05:57,623 --> 00:06:00,046 Those criminals will be brought to justice, 76 00:06:00,126 --> 00:06:02,915 or I'll know the reason why. We're on our way. 77 00:06:02,995 --> 00:06:04,417 Hurry, Caped Crusader. 78 00:06:04,497 --> 00:06:06,319 Whoever you may be under that cowl of yours, 79 00:06:06,399 --> 00:06:09,366 you paladin of virtue, you're our only hope. 80 00:06:14,607 --> 00:06:15,673 To the Batcave. 81 00:06:53,646 --> 00:06:55,045 (CONTROLS BEEPING) 82 00:06:59,685 --> 00:07:01,552 (TIRES SCREECH) 83 00:07:23,476 --> 00:07:25,376 (TIRES SCREECHING) 84 00:07:33,753 --> 00:07:37,810 "Poor people have it, rich people need it, if you eat it, you die." 85 00:07:37,890 --> 00:07:39,745 - What is it? - Nothing. 86 00:07:39,825 --> 00:07:42,248 I can't come up with anything either, Batman. 87 00:07:42,328 --> 00:07:45,618 No, Chief, the answer is "nothing." 88 00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:50,089 How can "nothing" be a clue, when it's not even a thing? 89 00:07:50,169 --> 00:07:54,093 In this case, "nothing" is certainly something. 90 00:07:54,173 --> 00:07:55,995 - Robin? - Let's see... 91 00:07:56,075 --> 00:07:59,165 Zero. Zilch. Goose egg. 92 00:07:59,245 --> 00:08:00,533 Precisely. 93 00:08:00,613 --> 00:08:03,669 Farmer Jones delivered a shipment of his prizewinning goose eggs 94 00:08:03,749 --> 00:08:06,339 to the local market just last week. 95 00:08:06,419 --> 00:08:08,441 They're after eggs? 96 00:08:08,521 --> 00:08:12,345 It's not what was delivered, Commissioner, rather when. 97 00:08:12,425 --> 00:08:16,115 Last Tuesday, which was also the night of the total lunar eclipse. 98 00:08:16,195 --> 00:08:18,384 You see, it's really quite simple. 99 00:08:18,464 --> 00:08:22,855 The Atomic Energy Laboratory, headed by our old friend, Professor Nichols, 100 00:08:22,935 --> 00:08:28,561 just opened a new wing dedicated to the science of total lunar eclipses. 101 00:08:28,641 --> 00:08:31,631 And I'll bet my cowl the laboratory is where 102 00:08:31,711 --> 00:08:34,867 those felonious fiends are going to strike next. 103 00:08:34,947 --> 00:08:38,538 Of course, how could I not see it myself? 104 00:08:38,618 --> 00:08:42,186 Come on, Robin, there's a bad moon on the rise. 105 00:08:42,955 --> 00:08:44,688 To the Batmobile! 106 00:08:47,627 --> 00:08:49,815 What would we do without him, Commissioner? 107 00:08:49,895 --> 00:08:52,796 I shudder to even consider it, O'Hara. 108 00:08:59,805 --> 00:09:01,494 Not so fast, old chum. 109 00:09:01,574 --> 00:09:03,195 But we're in a hurry, Batman. 110 00:09:03,275 --> 00:09:07,333 Jaywalking is extremely hazardous, especially at night. 111 00:09:07,413 --> 00:09:10,369 As duly deputized officers of the law, 112 00:09:10,449 --> 00:09:12,772 it is imperative we follow the rules. 113 00:09:12,852 --> 00:09:14,574 Gosh, yes, you're right, Batman. 114 00:09:14,654 --> 00:09:17,677 No one's above the law, even when you're trying to enforce it. 115 00:09:17,757 --> 00:09:20,257 Quickly, Robin, to the crosswalk! 116 00:09:31,137 --> 00:09:34,226 The Replica Ray has the ability to scan an object 117 00:09:34,306 --> 00:09:36,696 and create an identical version. 118 00:09:36,776 --> 00:09:38,242 Observe. 119 00:09:39,612 --> 00:09:40,844 (CLICKS) 120 00:09:44,316 --> 00:09:46,439 (SCIENTISTS GASP) 121 00:09:46,519 --> 00:09:50,776 As you might imagine, the applications are endless. 122 00:09:50,856 --> 00:09:52,645 Does anyone have any questions? 123 00:09:52,725 --> 00:09:55,448 I do... 124 00:09:55,528 --> 00:09:57,483 - (GASPS) - (SPEAKING GERMAN) 125 00:09:57,563 --> 00:09:58,918 Riddle me this. 126 00:09:58,998 --> 00:10:02,154 What is black and blue and red all over? 127 00:10:02,234 --> 00:10:03,756 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 128 00:10:03,836 --> 00:10:06,993 Answer. You, if you don't hand over the ray. 129 00:10:07,073 --> 00:10:08,661 You heard him, knave. 130 00:10:08,741 --> 00:10:10,896 Never! 131 00:10:10,976 --> 00:10:14,133 It's too important to give to filthy criminal types such as yourselves. 132 00:10:14,213 --> 00:10:17,136 Oh! You dare defy us? 133 00:10:17,216 --> 00:10:20,139 You must be insane. And here's the proof! 134 00:10:20,219 --> 00:10:22,119 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 135 00:10:23,389 --> 00:10:26,957 (SCIENTISTS LAUGHING) 136 00:10:31,397 --> 00:10:34,331 Why, you're practically certifiable. 137 00:10:35,434 --> 00:10:38,736 (ALL LAUGHING) 138 00:10:41,073 --> 00:10:44,163 BATMAN: Scientists, head for cover. 139 00:10:44,243 --> 00:10:47,366 The only things these fiends will be multiplying with that device 140 00:10:47,446 --> 00:10:49,702 is their prison sentences. 141 00:10:49,782 --> 00:10:53,606 Great quivering jellyfish, the dynamic dunderheads! 142 00:10:53,686 --> 00:10:56,353 Into the fray, my fitness finks. 143 00:11:14,607 --> 00:11:15,839 (GROANS) 144 00:11:30,055 --> 00:11:32,189 (GRUNTING) 145 00:11:37,496 --> 00:11:38,862 (CACKLES) 146 00:11:41,066 --> 00:11:42,699 (CACKLING) 147 00:11:54,446 --> 00:11:55,835 (CACKLES) 148 00:11:55,915 --> 00:11:57,581 (GROANING) 149 00:12:02,788 --> 00:12:08,547 Oh, Batman, give up this life of excessive do-gooding and join us. 150 00:12:08,627 --> 00:12:11,762 A man of your skills could be quite useful to me. 151 00:12:12,264 --> 00:12:13,397 Us... 152 00:12:14,767 --> 00:12:17,523 When heck freezes over, you shameless Bathsheba. 153 00:12:17,603 --> 00:12:20,593 Let the grownups talk, boy bird-brain. 154 00:12:20,673 --> 00:12:24,930 Tag! You're it! (MANIC LAUGHTER) 155 00:12:25,010 --> 00:12:28,200 We could have a lot of fun. What do you say? 156 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:31,203 I say, renounce your evil ways, Catwoman. 157 00:12:31,283 --> 00:12:34,618 Cease this infernal flirting. (GRUNTS) 158 00:12:40,459 --> 00:12:42,314 Three Catwomen! 159 00:12:42,394 --> 00:12:45,417 - Is that so bad? - Of course it is! 160 00:12:45,497 --> 00:12:47,286 Now he has to pick just one. 161 00:12:47,366 --> 00:12:50,623 Perhaps not! 162 00:12:50,703 --> 00:12:53,259 Batman, they're getting away with the Replica Ray. 163 00:12:53,339 --> 00:12:56,940 Ironic, since I'm seeing triple. 164 00:12:59,078 --> 00:13:01,645 They won't get far. To the Batmobile. 165 00:13:02,548 --> 00:13:04,548 (ALL LAUGHING) 166 00:13:13,726 --> 00:13:15,726 (TIRES SCREECHING) 167 00:13:16,262 --> 00:13:17,327 (HONKING) 168 00:13:24,236 --> 00:13:26,637 (TIRES SCREECHING) 169 00:13:28,841 --> 00:13:29,907 (ALL LAUGHING) 170 00:14:04,944 --> 00:14:07,044 Holy crumbling infrastructure! 171 00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:10,536 (TIRES SCREECHING) 172 00:14:10,616 --> 00:14:13,684 Robin, time to use our trusty Batzooka! 173 00:14:21,060 --> 00:14:23,560 (TIRES SCREECHING) 174 00:14:25,497 --> 00:14:28,398 (MANIC CHUCKLING) 175 00:14:31,270 --> 00:14:33,136 (TIRES SCREECH) 176 00:14:36,075 --> 00:14:38,041 ROBIN: Holy trench warfare! 177 00:14:46,485 --> 00:14:47,718 Tin foil? 178 00:14:51,290 --> 00:14:53,345 What does it mean, Batman? 179 00:14:53,425 --> 00:14:55,180 We were foiled, Robin. 180 00:14:55,260 --> 00:14:57,950 A taunt from our arrogant adversaries. 181 00:14:58,030 --> 00:15:02,733 But in their hubris, they may have left a clue to the location of their lair. 182 00:15:05,671 --> 00:15:10,696 This machine contains the information of two sets of encyclopedias. 183 00:15:10,776 --> 00:15:14,266 It'll be able to collect and analyze data in mere seconds. 184 00:15:14,346 --> 00:15:17,603 Holy Einstein! That's a lot of brain power. 185 00:15:17,683 --> 00:15:18,882 (MACHINE WHIRRS) 186 00:15:20,285 --> 00:15:23,609 Amorphous semi-crystalline layers. 187 00:15:23,689 --> 00:15:25,044 Starch. 188 00:15:25,124 --> 00:15:27,713 More precisely, gravy. 189 00:15:27,793 --> 00:15:29,048 So what does it mean? 190 00:15:29,128 --> 00:15:32,751 Take all the clues together, the foil, the gravy... 191 00:15:32,831 --> 00:15:34,286 Holy Salisbury steak! 192 00:15:34,366 --> 00:15:36,722 - That could only mean... - Right again, old chum. 193 00:15:36,802 --> 00:15:39,925 The Fitzsimmons TV dinner factory is where they're holed up. 194 00:15:40,005 --> 00:15:41,104 Let's go. 195 00:15:52,885 --> 00:15:54,440 I say! 196 00:15:54,520 --> 00:15:57,676 It is patently preposterous, you pretentious poser! 197 00:15:57,756 --> 00:16:03,983 With this ray we can multiply money, diamonds, females... Heh... 198 00:16:04,063 --> 00:16:08,187 I wouldn't expect you to understand, you boorish bird. 199 00:16:08,267 --> 00:16:12,124 Only those who view crime as an art form have true vision. 200 00:16:12,204 --> 00:16:13,692 Right, Joker? 201 00:16:13,772 --> 00:16:17,329 Oh, don't drag me into your tedious tete-a-tete. 202 00:16:17,409 --> 00:16:20,833 As long as the punch line is funny, I don't care. 203 00:16:20,913 --> 00:16:22,868 CATWOMAN: Enough caterwauling. 204 00:16:22,948 --> 00:16:26,939 None of it will matter if Batman stops us, like he always does. 205 00:16:27,019 --> 00:16:28,507 Oh, dear me. 206 00:16:28,587 --> 00:16:31,643 Someone's being a touchy tatty. (LAUGHS) 207 00:16:31,723 --> 00:16:34,513 Ooh! Why the bad humor, Catwoman? 208 00:16:34,593 --> 00:16:39,718 I'm just saying we need Batmam on our side if we want to truly thrive. 209 00:16:39,798 --> 00:16:45,024 My greatest joy as a super crook is confounding that cowled clod! 210 00:16:45,104 --> 00:16:47,493 Still, you do have a point. 211 00:16:47,573 --> 00:16:50,462 But how do you turn a bat into a rat? 212 00:16:50,542 --> 00:16:52,364 I call it Batnip. 213 00:16:52,444 --> 00:16:57,569 One scratch, and mass muscles will be mine to manipulate. 214 00:16:57,649 --> 00:16:59,905 (SCOFFS) That's been tried before, 215 00:16:59,985 --> 00:17:02,541 by better crooks than you. 216 00:17:02,621 --> 00:17:04,643 - (CRACKS WHIP) - Watch your tongue. 217 00:17:04,723 --> 00:17:07,212 No one challenges the princess of plunder. 218 00:17:07,292 --> 00:17:09,314 It will work, I guarantee it. 219 00:17:09,394 --> 00:17:10,582 Now, quickly... 220 00:17:10,662 --> 00:17:13,864 No doubt he's already on his way. 221 00:17:14,633 --> 00:17:16,855 Feisty feline. 222 00:17:16,935 --> 00:17:19,491 Soon you'll be a diva declawed. 223 00:17:19,571 --> 00:17:20,804 (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 224 00:17:30,415 --> 00:17:33,705 With those four felons possibly hiding in wait for us, 225 00:17:33,785 --> 00:17:36,052 we don't dare use the front door. 226 00:17:43,829 --> 00:17:45,162 (CLINKING) 227 00:17:47,332 --> 00:17:50,255 ROBIN: (GRUNTS) Really feeling the burn in the legs, Batman. 228 00:17:50,335 --> 00:17:52,891 That ballet practice took a lot out of me. 229 00:17:52,971 --> 00:17:55,194 Thus supporting my suspicion 230 00:17:55,274 --> 00:17:59,064 you've been focusing too much on your upper-body strength during workouts. 231 00:17:59,144 --> 00:18:02,412 Gee whiz, I have been spending a lot of time on my biceps. 232 00:18:09,555 --> 00:18:14,313 A frozen TV dinner factory. 233 00:18:14,393 --> 00:18:19,651 Appropriate, as you'll all soon be put on ice in Gotham State Penitentiary. 234 00:18:19,731 --> 00:18:21,386 Show yourselves. 235 00:18:21,466 --> 00:18:25,124 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 236 00:18:25,204 --> 00:18:27,960 JOKER: Oh, stop me if you've heard this one, Batman. 237 00:18:28,040 --> 00:18:31,096 Why don't eggs tell jokes? 238 00:18:31,176 --> 00:18:33,132 Because they crack each other up. 239 00:18:33,212 --> 00:18:36,768 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 240 00:18:36,848 --> 00:18:39,216 You need new material. 241 00:18:39,918 --> 00:18:41,952 Fools! Get them. 242 00:19:05,911 --> 00:19:07,811 (GROANING) 243 00:19:08,747 --> 00:19:10,536 One last time, Catwoman, 244 00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:13,872 I implore you to turn yourself in without a fight. 245 00:19:13,952 --> 00:19:16,708 You will be gentle with me, Batman? 246 00:19:16,788 --> 00:19:21,124 You have my assurance I will handle you... personally. 247 00:19:22,694 --> 00:19:26,185 That sounds divine. I'd like that very much. 248 00:19:26,265 --> 00:19:27,519 Shall we go, then? 249 00:19:27,599 --> 00:19:30,355 But first, may I fix my hair? 250 00:19:30,435 --> 00:19:32,791 I always like to look good for the judge. 251 00:19:32,871 --> 00:19:37,396 A woman as beauteous as yourself should be allowed to look her best. 252 00:19:37,476 --> 00:19:39,943 You've earned that much for doing the right thing. 253 00:19:44,449 --> 00:19:46,872 - (BATMAN GROANS) - ROBIN: Holy noxious gas! 254 00:19:46,952 --> 00:19:48,351 (GROANS) 255 00:19:49,821 --> 00:19:52,188 Goodnight, sweet prince. 256 00:19:53,959 --> 00:19:56,715 (GROANS) 257 00:19:56,795 --> 00:20:00,697 CATWOMAN: Rise and shine, my winged warriors. 258 00:20:02,734 --> 00:20:05,468 It doesn't have to be this way, Batman. 259 00:20:06,104 --> 00:20:07,893 You're right. 260 00:20:07,973 --> 00:20:10,062 It's not too late to renounce your evil ways, Catwoman. 261 00:20:10,142 --> 00:20:14,666 You are the one who will renounce his ways, my dutiful do-gooder. 262 00:20:14,746 --> 00:20:18,070 Granted, you've been known to cloud the minds of men, 263 00:20:18,150 --> 00:20:21,607 but I live by a set of immalleable principles. 264 00:20:21,687 --> 00:20:24,176 Oh, that's where this comes in. 265 00:20:24,256 --> 00:20:30,427 After a dose, I think you'll find your principles less rigid. 266 00:20:34,633 --> 00:20:35,932 (GROANS) 267 00:20:39,771 --> 00:20:42,761 What did you do to him, you sinful succubus? 268 00:20:42,841 --> 00:20:44,074 Observe. 269 00:20:44,676 --> 00:20:46,676 Kiss me, Batman. 270 00:20:47,979 --> 00:20:49,245 I... 271 00:20:51,216 --> 00:20:54,306 - I... - Batman, no! Don't do it. 272 00:20:54,386 --> 00:20:56,642 - Will... - Don't do it. 273 00:20:56,722 --> 00:20:58,088 Will... 274 00:21:00,525 --> 00:21:01,725 Not! 275 00:21:03,028 --> 00:21:05,250 Don't worry, old chum. 276 00:21:05,330 --> 00:21:09,599 My moral fiber is stronger than any substance this she-devil might concoct. 277 00:21:11,336 --> 00:21:14,226 Oh, well, no use crying over spilled milk. 278 00:21:14,306 --> 00:21:17,929 Ah! I told you it wouldn't work. (EXCLAIMS) 279 00:21:18,009 --> 00:21:19,665 Never mind, Pengi... 280 00:21:19,745 --> 00:21:22,301 Magic potions may not affect Batman, 281 00:21:22,381 --> 00:21:25,837 but I'm sure good old-fashioned fire does. 282 00:21:25,917 --> 00:21:27,450 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 283 00:21:39,398 --> 00:21:45,290 Our most hated foes are about to become a human TV dinner. 284 00:21:45,370 --> 00:21:47,826 Huzzah! Huzzah! 285 00:21:47,906 --> 00:21:49,995 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 286 00:21:50,075 --> 00:21:55,467 Fiends! I swear by all that is just, you will rue this day. 287 00:21:55,547 --> 00:21:58,437 The only roux here is in the gravy. 288 00:21:58,517 --> 00:22:00,505 (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 289 00:22:00,585 --> 00:22:04,142 Come, my capricious cronies in criminality. 290 00:22:04,222 --> 00:22:06,656 (ALL LAUGHING) 291 00:22:07,459 --> 00:22:10,048 (BLOWS A KISS) 292 00:22:10,128 --> 00:22:11,783 It's starting to heat up, Batman. 293 00:22:11,863 --> 00:22:14,186 (SNIFFING) But, we do smell delicious. 294 00:22:14,266 --> 00:22:17,000 The smell of death, Robin, I'm afraid. 295 00:22:20,105 --> 00:22:22,160 Guess this is our last meal, Batman. 296 00:22:22,240 --> 00:22:26,064 Then this is one time I would advocate starting with dessert. 297 00:22:26,144 --> 00:22:27,466 (GULPS) 298 00:22:27,546 --> 00:22:30,302 I suppose it doesn't matter if we ruin our appetites now. 299 00:22:30,382 --> 00:22:33,683 No, Robin. The dessert is a lemon tart. 300 00:22:34,553 --> 00:22:36,541 Holy citric enzymes! 301 00:22:36,621 --> 00:22:38,143 Lemons are acidic. 302 00:22:38,223 --> 00:22:39,811 Correct, Robin. 303 00:22:39,891 --> 00:22:43,548 Now if I can just cover my ropes with this lemon filling, 304 00:22:43,628 --> 00:22:47,564 the acidic content might be enough to weaken my bonds. 305 00:22:48,467 --> 00:22:50,033 (FIRE CRACKLING) 306 00:22:55,807 --> 00:22:57,662 ROBIN: Hurry, Batman! 307 00:22:57,742 --> 00:22:59,564 (STRAINING) 308 00:22:59,644 --> 00:23:01,244 - (GRUNTS) - (SNAPS) 309 00:23:07,919 --> 00:23:11,042 Holy entree, Batman! We were almost done for. 310 00:23:11,122 --> 00:23:13,111 Well done, to be precise. 311 00:23:13,191 --> 00:23:16,448 Though I find it quite distasteful they got away. 312 00:23:16,528 --> 00:23:19,084 At least Catwoman's play to turn you evil didn't work. 313 00:23:19,164 --> 00:23:21,052 True. 314 00:23:21,132 --> 00:23:23,755 Now we still have to uncover what those malicious miscreants 315 00:23:23,835 --> 00:23:26,369 have planned for the Replica Ray. 316 00:23:34,813 --> 00:23:36,101 Can you believe it? 317 00:23:36,181 --> 00:23:40,071 Those Bolsheviks in Belgravia have launched another manned space flight. 318 00:23:40,151 --> 00:23:42,240 Shameful indeed, Chief. 319 00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:44,476 It seems when it comes to the space race, 320 00:23:44,556 --> 00:23:47,712 we've fallen even further behind. 321 00:23:47,792 --> 00:23:50,749 BATMAN: Watching television while on the job? 322 00:23:50,829 --> 00:23:53,452 I certainly don't condone that, Commissioner. 323 00:23:53,532 --> 00:23:55,554 Oh, uh, of course, Batman. 324 00:23:55,634 --> 00:23:57,122 So sorry. We were just... 325 00:23:57,202 --> 00:24:00,258 BATMAN: It's not me you need to apologize to. 326 00:24:00,338 --> 00:24:03,728 It's the law-abiding taxpayers of Gotham City. 327 00:24:03,808 --> 00:24:06,398 You're quite right, Caped Crusader. 328 00:24:06,478 --> 00:24:09,634 Begorra! I've never been so ashamed. 329 00:24:09,714 --> 00:24:11,470 Enough sniveling, gentlemen. 330 00:24:11,550 --> 00:24:14,139 We're here on more pressing matters. 331 00:24:14,219 --> 00:24:16,808 The Joker and his crooked cohorts got away. 332 00:24:16,888 --> 00:24:20,779 We're sure they're causing mayhem to Gotham City. But where? 333 00:24:20,859 --> 00:24:24,015 Strangely enough, we haven't heard a peep from them, Boy Wonder. 334 00:24:24,095 --> 00:24:25,650 Not a peep? 335 00:24:25,730 --> 00:24:27,630 How unlike those fiends. 336 00:24:35,273 --> 00:24:38,930 Harriet Cooper, you know this is Bruce's 337 00:24:39,010 --> 00:24:43,168 hallowed and forbidden no woman's land. Oh! 338 00:24:43,248 --> 00:24:46,316 But I just know he's hiding something. 339 00:24:47,619 --> 00:24:49,519 A red phone. 340 00:24:51,356 --> 00:24:53,156 My, how unique. 341 00:24:54,225 --> 00:24:55,425 (HARRIET GASPS) 342 00:24:56,595 --> 00:24:58,950 Mustn't touch, Aunt Harriet. 343 00:24:59,030 --> 00:25:02,454 The oil from your fingers can ruin the finish. 344 00:25:02,534 --> 00:25:04,155 Bruce! I... 345 00:25:04,235 --> 00:25:06,024 - I was just... - Leaving? 346 00:25:06,104 --> 00:25:08,193 Yes. Of course. 347 00:25:08,273 --> 00:25:10,795 (SIGHS) Land's sakes! 348 00:25:10,875 --> 00:25:12,998 How did I end up in here? 349 00:25:13,078 --> 00:25:18,303 Wayne Manor is so big, it's easy to get turned around. (LAUGHS) 350 00:25:18,383 --> 00:25:20,305 (CHUCKLING NERVOUSLY) 351 00:25:20,385 --> 00:25:21,884 Toodle-oo boys! 352 00:25:23,555 --> 00:25:25,343 Gosh, that was close. 353 00:25:25,423 --> 00:25:27,746 Too close, I'm afraid. 354 00:25:27,826 --> 00:25:30,815 - Alfred! - (DOOR OPENS) 355 00:25:30,895 --> 00:25:32,031 Sir. 356 00:25:32,131 --> 00:25:35,720 Aunt Harriet almost uncovered our most intimate of secrets, 357 00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,690 our true identities as crime fighters. 358 00:25:38,770 --> 00:25:41,660 It's your job to keep her away from this study. 359 00:25:41,740 --> 00:25:45,063 Deepest apologies, sir. It won't happen again. 360 00:25:45,143 --> 00:25:46,598 No, it won't. 361 00:25:46,678 --> 00:25:48,667 You're dismissed. 362 00:25:48,747 --> 00:25:50,402 For the night? 363 00:25:50,482 --> 00:25:51,981 Forever. 364 00:25:53,685 --> 00:25:55,885 Bruce, surely you don't mean it. 365 00:26:00,425 --> 00:26:02,247 It's quite all right, Master Dick. 366 00:26:02,327 --> 00:26:05,450 Master Bruce, it has been an honor to serve you. 367 00:26:05,530 --> 00:26:07,063 (TEARFULLY) Goodbye, Alfred. 368 00:26:08,833 --> 00:26:11,734 I'm sure you'll continue to make me proud, Master Dick. 369 00:26:12,937 --> 00:26:14,170 Goodbye. 370 00:26:15,940 --> 00:26:17,073 (DOOR OPENS) 371 00:26:20,145 --> 00:26:23,101 Gosh, Bruce, he's been with you since you were a boy. 372 00:26:23,181 --> 00:26:25,070 It wasn't that big of a deal. 373 00:26:25,150 --> 00:26:27,405 An entire city depends on us. 374 00:26:27,485 --> 00:26:30,809 Clearly, Alfred had gotten too comfortable here. 375 00:26:30,889 --> 00:26:34,446 I suspect a change would be best for both of us. 376 00:26:34,526 --> 00:26:37,248 Now, enough sentimentality. 377 00:26:37,328 --> 00:26:39,618 There's much work yet to do. 378 00:26:39,698 --> 00:26:41,431 To the Batcave! 379 00:26:46,137 --> 00:26:47,437 Now! 380 00:27:21,005 --> 00:27:22,305 (BUBBLING) 381 00:28:02,714 --> 00:28:05,670 Holy dragnet! We've looked everywhere, Batman. 382 00:28:05,750 --> 00:28:07,539 Downtown, uptown, in the bay... 383 00:28:07,619 --> 00:28:09,574 It doesn't make any sense. 384 00:28:09,654 --> 00:28:11,309 Maybe they've given up. 385 00:28:11,389 --> 00:28:13,912 I mean it's either that or they're not on this planet. 386 00:28:13,992 --> 00:28:17,248 Great Scott, that's it, Robin! Lex parsimoniae. 387 00:28:17,328 --> 00:28:19,984 Latin for "law of parsimony"? 388 00:28:20,064 --> 00:28:23,888 Good job. Your grasp of the dead languages has improved. 389 00:28:23,968 --> 00:28:26,702 No language can be dead if it lives in your heart. 390 00:28:27,605 --> 00:28:29,094 Quite true. 391 00:28:29,174 --> 00:28:30,862 Law of parsimony. 392 00:28:30,942 --> 00:28:33,364 Also known as Occam's Razor. 393 00:28:33,444 --> 00:28:38,169 When you have two competing theories, the simplest one tends to be true. 394 00:28:38,249 --> 00:28:41,206 So I ask you, did the most depraved, 395 00:28:41,286 --> 00:28:44,609 evil, cold-hearted individuals throw in the towel? 396 00:28:44,689 --> 00:28:47,078 Or is it something simpler? 397 00:28:47,158 --> 00:28:52,083 We can't find them because they're no longer on this planet. 398 00:28:52,163 --> 00:28:54,753 - Holy Trojan horse! - Yes, Robin. 399 00:28:54,833 --> 00:28:58,757 I contend those thieves hitched a ride on that Belgravian rocket 400 00:28:58,837 --> 00:29:01,204 that was just launched into space. 401 00:29:07,712 --> 00:29:10,401 COSMONAUT: Approaching Space Station, comrade. 402 00:29:10,481 --> 00:29:12,348 Prepare to dock. 403 00:29:13,785 --> 00:29:15,740 JOKER: Oh, pardon me, boys, 404 00:29:15,820 --> 00:29:19,043 but could you direct me to the powder room in this tin can? 405 00:29:19,123 --> 00:29:20,578 No? 406 00:29:20,658 --> 00:29:23,748 Then I'm afraid you'll have to take a powder. 407 00:29:23,828 --> 00:29:27,152 Pengi? (MANIC LAUGHTER) 408 00:29:27,232 --> 00:29:29,932 - (GAS HISSES) - (COUGHING) 409 00:29:32,971 --> 00:29:36,394 Sweet dreams, my comatose cosmonauts. 410 00:29:36,474 --> 00:29:38,274 (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 411 00:29:42,513 --> 00:29:44,146 To the Batrocket! 412 00:29:46,417 --> 00:29:47,583 (BEEPS) 413 00:30:00,064 --> 00:30:01,753 Gosh, Batman. 414 00:30:01,833 --> 00:30:04,956 I never thought we'd need the Batrocket on one of our cases. 415 00:30:05,036 --> 00:30:10,461 An intergalactic spaceship is just another tool in a crime fighter's arsenal. 416 00:30:10,541 --> 00:30:12,430 Now, Robin, 417 00:30:12,510 --> 00:30:16,467 space travel is the most dangerous endeavor man has ever embarked upon. 418 00:30:16,547 --> 00:30:18,770 I need to know if you have the right stuff. 419 00:30:18,850 --> 00:30:21,840 If brave men weren't willing to take bold risks, 420 00:30:21,920 --> 00:30:25,543 we wouldn't be able to move forward as a society. 421 00:30:25,623 --> 00:30:29,047 Then we take a bold risk now, for Gotham City. 422 00:30:29,127 --> 00:30:31,216 Initiate Bat-countdown. 423 00:30:31,296 --> 00:30:33,518 - T-minus 10 seconds. - (BATROCKET POWERING UP) 424 00:30:33,598 --> 00:30:34,997 Fire booster rockets. 425 00:30:37,535 --> 00:30:39,268 Adjust Bat-radar dish. 426 00:30:43,107 --> 00:30:44,340 Open launch doors. 427 00:30:48,446 --> 00:30:49,868 T-minus five... 428 00:30:49,948 --> 00:30:51,236 Four... Three... 429 00:30:51,316 --> 00:30:52,403 Two... One! 430 00:30:52,483 --> 00:30:54,517 Ignition. Ready to move out. 431 00:31:14,739 --> 00:31:16,672 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 432 00:31:17,475 --> 00:31:18,997 How delicious! 433 00:31:19,077 --> 00:31:22,166 I've always wanted to rule from the stars. 434 00:31:22,246 --> 00:31:25,236 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 435 00:31:25,316 --> 00:31:30,074 This will go down in history as the greatest caper in the universe. 436 00:31:30,154 --> 00:31:31,710 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 437 00:31:31,790 --> 00:31:36,180 And when we three are done, there'll be no one to stop us. (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 438 00:31:36,260 --> 00:31:40,251 There are four cats in this litter, you pudgy peon! 439 00:31:40,331 --> 00:31:44,188 Yes. But one runt which must get tossed out. 440 00:31:44,268 --> 00:31:46,224 Treachery! But why? 441 00:31:46,304 --> 00:31:48,726 You're soft on Batman. 442 00:31:48,806 --> 00:31:50,962 And we all know how fickle cats can be. 443 00:31:51,042 --> 00:31:53,197 Who's to say you won't turn on us... 444 00:31:53,277 --> 00:31:54,410 For him? 445 00:31:56,848 --> 00:31:59,103 Ha! The cat's got her own tongue. 446 00:31:59,183 --> 00:32:02,607 Ah, well... (MANIC LAUGHTER) 447 00:32:02,687 --> 00:32:06,077 Just think of it as one small step for mankind, 448 00:32:06,157 --> 00:32:10,092 and you'll be able to swim back to Earth. (MANIC LAUGHTER) 449 00:32:12,296 --> 00:32:15,420 Oh... Get her boys! 450 00:32:15,500 --> 00:32:17,266 - (YELLING) - (GRUNTING) 451 00:32:30,348 --> 00:32:33,571 ROBIN: That's some space station, Batman. 452 00:32:33,651 --> 00:32:36,808 A top secret joint venture between our government 453 00:32:36,888 --> 00:32:39,010 and the government of Belgravia. 454 00:32:39,090 --> 00:32:42,647 Ultimately our two countries couldn't figure out a way to work together 455 00:32:42,727 --> 00:32:43,948 and it was abandoned. 456 00:32:44,028 --> 00:32:45,984 - What a waste! - Yes. 457 00:32:46,064 --> 00:32:49,787 From up here it becomes clear that we're all one people. 458 00:32:49,867 --> 00:32:55,137 I hate to the core of my being when diplomacy is destroyed by myopic pride. 459 00:33:01,946 --> 00:33:03,946 BATMAN: Engage Bat-gravity boots. 460 00:33:05,049 --> 00:33:08,206 (CLUNKING) 461 00:33:08,286 --> 00:33:11,776 ROBIN: Holy helium! Bat-climbs would be much easier this way. 462 00:33:11,856 --> 00:33:14,779 BATMAN: Easier, but eventually your muscles would atrophy, 463 00:33:14,859 --> 00:33:17,115 your bones would lose density. 464 00:33:17,195 --> 00:33:21,352 You see, Robin, there are consequences to doing things the easy way, 465 00:33:21,432 --> 00:33:27,358 something villains rarely take into consideration when choosing a life of crime. 466 00:33:27,438 --> 00:33:28,771 ROBIN: Golly. Right again, Batman 467 00:33:32,376 --> 00:33:36,134 The only thing a cat hates more than water is the vacuum of space. 468 00:33:36,214 --> 00:33:39,037 Then I hope you can hold your breath, pussycat. 469 00:33:39,117 --> 00:33:42,707 Looks like the cat will go splat. (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 470 00:33:42,787 --> 00:33:45,643 And now, it's time to put you out for the night. 471 00:33:45,723 --> 00:33:48,224 JOKER: Off you go! (MANIC LAUGHTER) 472 00:33:52,130 --> 00:33:53,195 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 473 00:34:06,444 --> 00:34:08,077 (ALL CHUCKLING) 474 00:34:11,182 --> 00:34:13,171 (AIR HISSING) 475 00:34:13,251 --> 00:34:17,075 May I assume your twisted teammates turned the tables on you? 476 00:34:17,155 --> 00:34:20,778 Where's your chivalry, Batman? 477 00:34:20,858 --> 00:34:26,250 It's impolite to rub your masculine superiority in a woman's face. 478 00:34:26,330 --> 00:34:29,554 Serves you right, you depraved creature. 479 00:34:29,634 --> 00:34:31,622 Are you sure we can't kill him? 480 00:34:31,702 --> 00:34:35,026 When you're older, you'll come to appreciate the pungent allure 481 00:34:35,106 --> 00:34:37,929 of the feminine mystique, old chum. 482 00:34:38,009 --> 00:34:41,911 But now it's time to dish out some well-deserved fisticuffs. 483 00:34:43,681 --> 00:34:45,548 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 484 00:34:47,518 --> 00:34:50,108 BATMAN: Up with your flippers, you unholy three! 485 00:34:50,188 --> 00:34:54,256 And hope that I leave enough of you to put behind prison bars. 486 00:34:55,159 --> 00:34:58,249 Curses! It's Batman. 487 00:34:58,329 --> 00:35:00,585 Ha, the cat came back. 488 00:35:00,665 --> 00:35:04,088 Oh! How did he find us this time? 489 00:35:04,168 --> 00:35:06,157 Why, you quizzical creep! 490 00:35:06,237 --> 00:35:09,827 It wasn't me! I resisted the urge. 491 00:35:09,907 --> 00:35:12,830 He's Batman, you moronic muttonheads, that's how. 492 00:35:12,910 --> 00:35:18,169 Of course! You probably left a trail of breadcrumbs for your little loverboy. 493 00:35:18,249 --> 00:35:23,174 No, Penguin. I deduced where you were, but not why. 494 00:35:23,254 --> 00:35:25,810 Then riddle me this, Batman. 495 00:35:25,890 --> 00:35:28,479 How do you hold a party in space? 496 00:35:28,559 --> 00:35:31,616 Answer, you "plan-et." 497 00:35:31,696 --> 00:35:33,951 Only we want to make three. 498 00:35:34,031 --> 00:35:36,420 You diabolical devils! 499 00:35:36,500 --> 00:35:40,992 Yes, then there can be a Gotham City for each of us to control 500 00:35:41,072 --> 00:35:44,595 without interference from the caped clodpoles. 501 00:35:44,675 --> 00:35:47,498 Of all the world-creating arrogance! 502 00:35:47,578 --> 00:35:50,601 Don't worry, Batman, they'll soon be where they belong. 503 00:35:50,681 --> 00:35:52,670 Behind prison bars. 504 00:35:52,750 --> 00:35:56,941 Actually, Robin, I'm thinking of sending them out of the airlock. 505 00:35:57,021 --> 00:35:59,844 Yeah! Let's see how they like it. 506 00:35:59,924 --> 00:36:04,549 Ah! By the Marquess of Queensberry, you have to follow the rules! 507 00:36:04,629 --> 00:36:05,950 Do I? 508 00:36:06,030 --> 00:36:08,319 Of course, Batman! 509 00:36:08,399 --> 00:36:12,490 As duly deputized officers, we are honor-bound to follow the tenets of the law. 510 00:36:12,570 --> 00:36:16,527 Technically, we're outside of the jurisdiction of Gotham PD. 511 00:36:16,607 --> 00:36:19,308 Here, I play by my own rules. 512 00:36:19,977 --> 00:36:21,199 Egad! 513 00:36:21,279 --> 00:36:23,034 Batman's flipped his cowl. 514 00:36:23,114 --> 00:36:25,903 If not, we should do it for him. 515 00:36:25,983 --> 00:36:28,317 Ah, time to lighten the mood. 516 00:36:34,458 --> 00:36:36,080 Holy zero Gs! 517 00:36:36,160 --> 00:36:37,226 (ALL LAUGHING) 518 00:36:42,967 --> 00:36:44,066 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 519 00:36:45,936 --> 00:36:49,694 You were getting so heavy on us, Batman. 520 00:36:49,774 --> 00:36:50,973 - (THUD) - (GRUNTING) 521 00:36:51,609 --> 00:36:53,008 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 522 00:36:57,315 --> 00:36:58,547 (THUD) 523 00:37:00,518 --> 00:37:01,583 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 524 00:37:03,321 --> 00:37:06,388 Who says penguins can't fly? (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 525 00:37:07,591 --> 00:37:08,679 Ow! 526 00:37:08,759 --> 00:37:10,448 (MANIC LAUGHTER) Huh? 527 00:37:10,528 --> 00:37:11,593 (GRUNTING) 528 00:37:14,265 --> 00:37:15,253 (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 529 00:37:15,333 --> 00:37:16,398 (GRUNTS) 530 00:37:19,170 --> 00:37:22,693 Why are your punches like a bodybuilder without a gym? 531 00:37:22,773 --> 00:37:25,708 Answer, because they're weightless. 532 00:37:26,310 --> 00:37:27,376 You fiends! 533 00:37:30,514 --> 00:37:32,915 (ALL LAUGHING) 534 00:37:34,852 --> 00:37:35,918 (CLANG) 535 00:37:40,358 --> 00:37:41,623 (YELLING) 536 00:37:43,194 --> 00:37:44,793 (GROANING) 537 00:37:49,367 --> 00:37:51,400 Let's do this. 538 00:37:53,804 --> 00:37:55,459 (ALL GROANING) 539 00:37:55,539 --> 00:37:56,972 You wanna get nuts? 540 00:37:59,176 --> 00:38:00,998 - (GRUNTING) - Let's get nuts. 541 00:38:01,078 --> 00:38:02,644 (GRUNTING) 542 00:38:04,215 --> 00:38:05,581 (WHIMPERING) 543 00:38:10,187 --> 00:38:11,442 (SCREAMING) 544 00:38:11,522 --> 00:38:13,756 (THUDDING) 545 00:38:18,562 --> 00:38:20,184 (SCREAMING) 546 00:38:20,264 --> 00:38:22,820 - Riddler, this is the operating table. - No, no! 547 00:38:22,900 --> 00:38:25,189 Not the face, Batman. 548 00:38:25,269 --> 00:38:26,991 And I'm the surgeon. 549 00:38:27,071 --> 00:38:28,137 (GRUNTING) 550 00:38:30,174 --> 00:38:31,407 (YELLING) 551 00:38:32,443 --> 00:38:33,509 (ALL GROANING) 552 00:38:37,915 --> 00:38:40,204 - (PANTING) - Gee, Batman, will they be okay? 553 00:38:40,284 --> 00:38:43,274 BATMAN: They may forever walk with slight limps 554 00:38:43,354 --> 00:38:44,420 but they'll live. 555 00:38:45,256 --> 00:38:46,610 Look! 556 00:38:46,690 --> 00:38:47,945 Catwoman got away! 557 00:38:48,025 --> 00:38:49,680 That tricky temptress. 558 00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:54,018 She won't escape my grasp the next time we cross paths. 559 00:38:54,098 --> 00:38:55,998 But I'll enjoy her trying. 560 00:39:00,237 --> 00:39:05,863 Thanks to you, Caped Crusader, their plan of planetary proliferation was prevented. 561 00:39:05,943 --> 00:39:08,666 I'll just store the Replica Ray in the Batcave. 562 00:39:08,746 --> 00:39:11,736 It's too dangerous to fall into the wrong hands. 563 00:39:11,816 --> 00:39:15,373 Once again we owe a debt of gratitude we can never fully repay. 564 00:39:15,453 --> 00:39:17,541 But know that you will forever be... 565 00:39:17,621 --> 00:39:19,188 - (WIND BLOWING) - Batman? 566 00:39:21,125 --> 00:39:22,546 Where did Batman go? 567 00:39:22,626 --> 00:39:24,715 Begorra! He just disappeared. 568 00:39:24,795 --> 00:39:26,350 Like a bat in the night. 569 00:39:26,430 --> 00:39:29,698 Very dramatic indeed. And not like Batman at all. 570 00:39:30,668 --> 00:39:31,889 You'll have to forgive him. 571 00:39:31,969 --> 00:39:33,635 He's been a little out of sorts. 572 00:39:34,972 --> 00:39:36,305 Now, if you'll excuse me. 573 00:39:39,109 --> 00:39:40,509 Batman, wait for me! 574 00:39:41,011 --> 00:39:42,233 Batman? 575 00:39:42,313 --> 00:39:43,601 Holy hitchhiker! 576 00:39:43,681 --> 00:39:45,681 Now, how am I going to get back home? 577 00:39:52,656 --> 00:39:55,413 Now, give a hand for our next group, 578 00:39:55,493 --> 00:39:59,383 those manic minstrels from Manchester, 579 00:39:59,463 --> 00:40:02,019 - the Bed Bugs! - (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) 580 00:40:02,099 --> 00:40:03,398 (MUSIC PLAYING ON TV) 581 00:40:05,269 --> 00:40:08,225 Sorry, Dick. I just couldn't bear having to listen 582 00:40:08,305 --> 00:40:10,739 to the Commissioner prattle on anymore. 583 00:40:11,976 --> 00:40:14,576 Luckily, a citizen loaned me their bicycle. 584 00:40:16,480 --> 00:40:20,137 This Gotham Palace show is top drawer, old chum. 585 00:40:20,217 --> 00:40:22,706 And that host, Miranda Monroe, 586 00:40:22,786 --> 00:40:25,187 va-va-voom. 587 00:40:26,490 --> 00:40:29,780 Groovy, man, groovy. 588 00:40:29,860 --> 00:40:34,752 Mercy, you two are back from your "fishing trip" already? 589 00:40:34,832 --> 00:40:37,121 Something wrong with that, Aunt Harriet? 590 00:40:37,201 --> 00:40:40,424 Oh, don't mind me. (CHUCKLING) 591 00:40:40,504 --> 00:40:43,761 Please, tell me exactly what's so amusing. 592 00:40:43,841 --> 00:40:44,995 It's just... 593 00:40:45,075 --> 00:40:47,465 Out with it, you silly old woman! 594 00:40:47,545 --> 00:40:50,134 Heavens! Well, I never... 595 00:40:50,214 --> 00:40:51,780 (CRYING) 596 00:40:53,717 --> 00:40:55,473 I can't take this anymore, Bruce! 597 00:40:55,553 --> 00:40:58,809 So, you think I should get rid of the broad too? 598 00:40:58,889 --> 00:41:01,011 No. I'm talking about you. 599 00:41:01,091 --> 00:41:03,147 You've completely changed. 600 00:41:03,227 --> 00:41:06,517 Now, now, old chum. You're overreacting. 601 00:41:06,597 --> 00:41:08,953 Aren't you even worried about Alfred? 602 00:41:09,033 --> 00:41:13,835 Well, Dickie, if you're so concerned about Alfred, you're free to join him. 603 00:41:14,738 --> 00:41:16,071 On skid row. 604 00:41:19,743 --> 00:41:21,643 (MUSIC PLAYING ON TV) 605 00:41:32,923 --> 00:41:35,290 (MUTTERING) 606 00:41:42,099 --> 00:41:43,165 A-ha! 607 00:41:49,974 --> 00:41:52,997 Any progress on that shoplifting case, O'Hara? 608 00:41:53,077 --> 00:41:58,202 Well, you know, the witness, uh, and, uh, the, er... 609 00:41:58,282 --> 00:42:00,337 Say no more, Chief. 610 00:42:00,417 --> 00:42:03,185 You don't have to explain to me how difficult police work can be. 611 00:42:03,921 --> 00:42:05,020 Have you tried... 612 00:42:06,624 --> 00:42:07,823 (WHISPERING) You know who? 613 00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:12,383 Every 20 minutes. No answer. 614 00:42:12,463 --> 00:42:13,984 Maybe we should try again? 615 00:42:14,064 --> 00:42:15,697 My thoughts exactly. 616 00:42:20,270 --> 00:42:21,870 (BEEPING) 617 00:42:31,649 --> 00:42:32,714 (GRUNTING) 618 00:42:34,184 --> 00:42:37,252 How about you clean up your own mess for once? 619 00:42:40,624 --> 00:42:42,190 (ALARM RINGING) 620 00:42:43,961 --> 00:42:45,093 (TIRES SCREECHING) 621 00:42:56,040 --> 00:42:57,105 (GUN COCKING) 622 00:43:01,178 --> 00:43:02,411 (TIRES SCREECHING) 623 00:43:17,194 --> 00:43:20,784 Yes, but every available officer is already dispatched. 624 00:43:20,864 --> 00:43:23,120 We'll send someone to you as soon as we can. 625 00:43:23,200 --> 00:43:26,490 No, we don't know where Batman is any more than you do. 626 00:43:26,570 --> 00:43:28,325 The city is in chaos. 627 00:43:28,405 --> 00:43:30,372 Absolute chaos. 628 00:43:31,642 --> 00:43:32,941 BATMAN: Greetings, Commissioner. 629 00:43:33,877 --> 00:43:34,932 Chief. 630 00:43:35,012 --> 00:43:37,468 It the Caped Crusader himself! 631 00:43:37,548 --> 00:43:40,804 I must say, you are a sight for sore eyes. 632 00:43:40,884 --> 00:43:45,643 Saints preserve us, all those rosaries I've been saying have finally paid off. 633 00:43:45,723 --> 00:43:47,511 Where have you been, Batman? 634 00:43:47,591 --> 00:43:49,747 Thinking, Commissioner. 635 00:43:49,827 --> 00:43:53,929 I've been trying to figure out why you two are in charge of anything. 636 00:43:54,765 --> 00:43:56,654 Surely you jest, Batman. 637 00:43:56,734 --> 00:44:01,091 It's you two who jest by calling yourselves police officers. 638 00:44:01,171 --> 00:44:02,993 (BOTH GASP) 639 00:44:03,073 --> 00:44:07,031 I take a little time off and look at the state of Gotham City. 640 00:44:07,111 --> 00:44:10,512 Now, please remove your uniforms. 641 00:44:11,248 --> 00:44:12,936 Excuse me, Batman? 642 00:44:13,016 --> 00:44:14,471 I said, 643 00:44:14,551 --> 00:44:17,107 take off your uniforms. 644 00:44:17,187 --> 00:44:18,676 But why would we do that? 645 00:44:18,756 --> 00:44:21,423 Because you two don't deserve to wear them. 646 00:44:24,061 --> 00:44:26,817 Surely, you understand the city cannot run without a 647 00:44:26,897 --> 00:44:28,786 Commissioner and Chief of Police. 648 00:44:28,866 --> 00:44:30,120 No need to worry. 649 00:44:30,200 --> 00:44:32,856 I've already found your replacements. 650 00:44:32,936 --> 00:44:35,670 I think you'll find they're very qualified. 651 00:44:36,373 --> 00:44:37,695 The Replica Ray! 652 00:44:37,775 --> 00:44:39,608 What are you going to do with that? 653 00:44:49,453 --> 00:44:51,019 GORDON: Three Batmen! 654 00:44:53,624 --> 00:44:58,716 Allow me to introduce Gotham's new Chief of Police and Commissioner. 655 00:44:58,796 --> 00:45:02,297 Ready to run Gotham with a firm glove, Batman. 656 00:45:04,134 --> 00:45:05,200 Begorra. 657 00:45:07,571 --> 00:45:09,660 Have you gone mad, Batman? 658 00:45:09,740 --> 00:45:12,563 You've always said there never was enough of me to go around. 659 00:45:12,643 --> 00:45:15,065 That's no longer a problem. 660 00:45:15,145 --> 00:45:16,900 Chief, Commissioner, 661 00:45:16,980 --> 00:45:21,216 please escort the former Chief and Commissioner off the premises. 662 00:45:24,955 --> 00:45:28,112 From now on, Batman will be running this town. 663 00:45:28,192 --> 00:45:30,492 And eventually, the world. 664 00:45:31,161 --> 00:45:33,562 (LAUGHING) 665 00:45:39,670 --> 00:45:44,428 Mr. Mayor, the city no longer requires your ineffective management. 666 00:45:44,508 --> 00:45:46,541 - You're relieved from office. - (GRUNTING) 667 00:45:53,016 --> 00:45:58,286 Semple vs Strozier states any judge can be replaced by a citizen. 668 00:46:02,693 --> 00:46:06,049 Baking is as much a science as an art. 669 00:46:06,129 --> 00:46:09,931 The city deserves a boulanger who understands that. 670 00:46:14,371 --> 00:46:16,037 (MOANING) 671 00:46:33,090 --> 00:46:34,656 (ENGINE REVVING LOUDLY) 672 00:46:38,662 --> 00:46:39,828 (TIRES SCREECHING) 673 00:46:49,373 --> 00:46:50,438 First position. 674 00:46:51,041 --> 00:46:52,107 Second position. 675 00:46:54,511 --> 00:46:55,599 (SIGHS) 676 00:46:55,679 --> 00:46:57,367 Holy plie. 677 00:46:57,447 --> 00:47:00,304 How am I supposed to focus on my progressions 678 00:47:00,384 --> 00:47:02,817 when Batman progresses down a road of darkness? 679 00:47:04,354 --> 00:47:05,809 Progresses. 680 00:47:05,889 --> 00:47:08,445 How did I not see it before? 681 00:47:08,525 --> 00:47:10,614 Catwoman's Batnip did work! 682 00:47:10,694 --> 00:47:12,827 It's just been working slowly. 683 00:47:14,932 --> 00:47:18,199 If I'm going to save Batman, I need to go to the source. 684 00:47:29,947 --> 00:47:32,013 Sarsaparilla on the rocks. 685 00:47:33,550 --> 00:47:34,616 Please. 686 00:47:36,453 --> 00:47:37,519 Oh! 687 00:47:39,623 --> 00:47:40,689 Ow! 688 00:47:42,960 --> 00:47:45,849 (SLURPING) 689 00:47:45,929 --> 00:47:50,220 I hope you're proud of what you've done to Batman, you hateful hussy! 690 00:47:50,300 --> 00:47:53,857 I wanted him to be bad, but not that bad. 691 00:47:53,937 --> 00:47:56,159 You do know the difference, don't you? 692 00:47:56,239 --> 00:47:59,329 Give me the antidote, you licentious Lucrezia! 693 00:47:59,409 --> 00:48:01,365 There is an antidote, isn't there? 694 00:48:01,445 --> 00:48:03,166 Of course there's an antidote. 695 00:48:03,246 --> 00:48:05,402 We just have to get him to take it. 696 00:48:05,482 --> 00:48:08,338 - We? - You know how fond I am of Batman. 697 00:48:08,418 --> 00:48:12,910 Were it not for his unfortunate devotion to good, we'd be an item. 698 00:48:12,990 --> 00:48:15,579 Besides, the way he saved me from those double crossers, 699 00:48:15,659 --> 00:48:17,514 I suppose I owe him. 700 00:48:17,594 --> 00:48:18,916 Can I trust you? 701 00:48:18,996 --> 00:48:20,061 Cross my heart. 702 00:48:21,298 --> 00:48:23,253 I promise not to kill you. 703 00:48:23,333 --> 00:48:25,055 For now. 704 00:48:25,135 --> 00:48:26,234 (CAGE CREAKS OPEN) 705 00:48:28,338 --> 00:48:29,404 Then let's go. 706 00:48:30,307 --> 00:48:31,706 To the Catmobile! 707 00:48:35,112 --> 00:48:37,545 Holy Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! 708 00:48:43,520 --> 00:48:45,876 Are you old enough to drive one of these? 709 00:48:45,956 --> 00:48:48,278 Gosh, yes. I have my learner's permit, 710 00:48:48,358 --> 00:48:51,559 which means I can drive if another adult is in the vehicle. 711 00:48:54,865 --> 00:48:58,121 Remember, I'll be watching your every move, Catwoman. 712 00:48:58,201 --> 00:49:01,202 Kid, I always suspected you did. 713 00:49:05,809 --> 00:49:07,497 - Where to? - The Batcave. 714 00:49:07,577 --> 00:49:10,145 But your gonna have to take a catnap for this trip. 715 00:49:12,983 --> 00:49:14,471 Very well. 716 00:49:14,551 --> 00:49:16,785 But I expect you to keep your hands to yourself. 717 00:49:21,324 --> 00:49:22,390 (MOANING) 718 00:49:29,566 --> 00:49:30,632 (TIRES SCREECHING) 719 00:49:39,943 --> 00:49:41,009 (GROANING) 720 00:49:42,946 --> 00:49:48,983 Well, if it isn't the bachelor pad to end all bachelor pads. 721 00:49:54,925 --> 00:49:57,180 Should we hide before Batman finds us? 722 00:49:57,260 --> 00:49:59,116 He already knows we're here. 723 00:49:59,196 --> 00:50:01,129 BATMAN: Quite right, boy genius. 724 00:50:03,900 --> 00:50:06,857 It was just a matter of time before you returned. 725 00:50:06,937 --> 00:50:11,728 I'm just surprised you brought such a lovely guest. 726 00:50:11,808 --> 00:50:15,799 Batman, from the look of things, you're happy to see me. 727 00:50:15,879 --> 00:50:17,868 You know I am, doll. 728 00:50:17,948 --> 00:50:21,838 Listen, Batman. Catwoman's Batnip worked, only very slowly. 729 00:50:21,918 --> 00:50:23,840 That's the reason you're acting this way. 730 00:50:23,920 --> 00:50:26,209 Then it's her I have to thank. 731 00:50:26,289 --> 00:50:28,478 I much prefer the new me. 732 00:50:28,558 --> 00:50:33,717 I'm finally doing everything my old virtuous self wouldn't let me do. 733 00:50:33,797 --> 00:50:35,552 Your ego is out of control. 734 00:50:35,632 --> 00:50:37,187 You've taken over the city! 735 00:50:37,267 --> 00:50:39,222 And that's only the beginning. 736 00:50:39,302 --> 00:50:41,591 What about you, baby? You want to join me? 737 00:50:41,671 --> 00:50:43,693 Isn't that what you wanted all along? 738 00:50:43,773 --> 00:50:45,473 But what about Robin? 739 00:50:48,111 --> 00:50:49,177 Hmm. 740 00:50:49,646 --> 00:50:50,867 I know. 741 00:50:50,947 --> 00:50:52,069 We'll kill him. 742 00:50:52,149 --> 00:50:53,214 Purr-fect. 743 00:50:57,487 --> 00:51:00,655 I'll probably regret this, but a deal is a deal. 744 00:51:02,659 --> 00:51:04,314 (COUGHING) 745 00:51:04,394 --> 00:51:08,685 That's the antidote, Batman. You'll soon be back to your old self. 746 00:51:08,765 --> 00:51:11,455 Wrong, old chum. I anticipated this move 747 00:51:11,535 --> 00:51:14,369 and took the Bat-anti-antidote. 748 00:51:16,473 --> 00:51:18,728 Yup, I knew I'd regret it. 749 00:51:18,808 --> 00:51:20,597 You must be stopped! 750 00:51:20,677 --> 00:51:23,077 Then why don't you try, old chum? 751 00:51:26,983 --> 00:51:32,086 I know every move you'll make, because I taught you every move you know. 752 00:51:35,125 --> 00:51:38,048 An old-fashioned tool, Robin. 753 00:51:38,128 --> 00:51:40,895 A utility belt showdown. I accept. 754 00:51:50,540 --> 00:51:51,962 Bat-knockout gas! 755 00:51:52,042 --> 00:51:53,163 Bat-wake-up gas! 756 00:51:53,243 --> 00:51:54,609 (HISSING) 757 00:51:55,212 --> 00:51:56,277 Bat-cuffs! 758 00:51:57,480 --> 00:51:59,236 (CLICKING) 759 00:51:59,316 --> 00:52:00,381 Bat-lockpick. 760 00:52:01,251 --> 00:52:02,339 (SNAPS FINGERS) 761 00:52:02,419 --> 00:52:03,607 Bat-bomb! 762 00:52:03,687 --> 00:52:04,786 Bat-shield! 763 00:52:06,089 --> 00:52:08,445 Enough of this frivolous folderol. 764 00:52:08,525 --> 00:52:09,958 (WHIP CRACKING) 765 00:52:12,195 --> 00:52:13,261 (BOTH GRUNTING) 766 00:52:15,432 --> 00:52:17,432 Sweet dreams, fools. 767 00:52:19,336 --> 00:52:20,935 (BOTH MOANING) 768 00:52:22,839 --> 00:52:24,161 (BOTH STRUGGLING) 769 00:52:24,241 --> 00:52:26,774 Comfy, my tenacious twosome? 770 00:52:30,947 --> 00:52:32,335 Holy hydrogen! 771 00:52:32,415 --> 00:52:34,137 The nuclear silo. 772 00:52:34,217 --> 00:52:37,607 When I pull this lever, you'll be lowered into the silo 773 00:52:37,687 --> 00:52:42,423 at the exact moment it releases its radioactive steam. 774 00:52:43,126 --> 00:52:45,215 Any last requests? 775 00:52:45,295 --> 00:52:49,686 How 'bout a kiss, masked muscles? 776 00:52:49,766 --> 00:52:51,532 Sure thing, pussycat. 777 00:52:56,473 --> 00:52:57,538 (ROBIN CLEARS THROAT) 778 00:52:58,908 --> 00:53:00,830 You'll never get away with this, Batman. 779 00:53:00,910 --> 00:53:05,068 Boy, bird-brain, can't you see we're in the middle of something? 780 00:53:05,148 --> 00:53:06,503 Sorry. 781 00:53:06,583 --> 00:53:08,216 (BEEPING) 782 00:53:09,386 --> 00:53:11,708 I'm afraid our time's run out. 783 00:53:11,788 --> 00:53:15,056 Perhaps we'll meet again in your next life, Catwoman. 784 00:53:18,762 --> 00:53:23,153 Now, if you excuse me, I have a city to rule. 785 00:53:23,233 --> 00:53:25,199 (LAUGHING) 786 00:53:32,642 --> 00:53:33,841 (TIRES SCREECHING) 787 00:53:35,612 --> 00:53:37,211 (PULLEY WHIRRING) 788 00:53:39,783 --> 00:53:41,905 Drat, drat and double drat! 789 00:53:41,985 --> 00:53:43,840 My claws have no effect. 790 00:53:43,920 --> 00:53:47,577 Batman uses a special Bat-cable that doesn't fray. 791 00:53:47,657 --> 00:53:50,058 Perhaps we can swing ourselves to the railing. 792 00:53:51,127 --> 00:53:55,418 He raised it three inches, just enough to prevent us from clearing the rail. 793 00:53:55,498 --> 00:53:57,854 Then how the heck do we get outta here? 794 00:53:57,934 --> 00:53:59,600 I don't think we can. 795 00:54:00,470 --> 00:54:01,669 Brace yourself. 796 00:54:19,155 --> 00:54:20,810 How are we alive? 797 00:54:20,890 --> 00:54:23,380 While you were out on the drive here, I sprayed us both 798 00:54:23,460 --> 00:54:26,249 with a dose of Bat-anti-isotope spray 799 00:54:26,329 --> 00:54:29,085 to guard us against any radioactivity. 800 00:54:29,165 --> 00:54:31,788 I knew Batman would probably get the best of us 801 00:54:31,868 --> 00:54:34,991 and that our most likely fate would be the silo. 802 00:54:35,071 --> 00:54:37,761 Most impressive, Boy Wonder. 803 00:54:37,841 --> 00:54:41,064 I just hope we haven't lost Batman forever. 804 00:54:41,144 --> 00:54:42,999 We'll need muscle to stop him. 805 00:54:43,079 --> 00:54:46,803 No one's crazy enough to take on all those Batmen. 806 00:54:46,883 --> 00:54:48,104 You're wrong, Catwoman. 807 00:54:48,184 --> 00:54:49,817 There's a whole prison of them. 808 00:54:55,925 --> 00:54:58,915 We're Gotham State prison inspectors. 809 00:54:58,995 --> 00:55:01,251 I've never heard of prison inspectors before. 810 00:55:01,331 --> 00:55:02,919 Why wasn't I informed of this? 811 00:55:02,999 --> 00:55:05,088 It's a new position, Warden. 812 00:55:05,168 --> 00:55:08,258 You do want to ensure the safety of the prisoners 813 00:55:08,338 --> 00:55:11,094 and all that garbage, don't you? 814 00:55:11,174 --> 00:55:13,930 Madame, I assure you, we go by the book. 815 00:55:14,010 --> 00:55:15,476 Oh, is that so? 816 00:55:23,953 --> 00:55:26,009 Those pickaxes aren't up to code! 817 00:55:26,089 --> 00:55:27,677 They must be replaced. 818 00:55:27,757 --> 00:55:30,758 Lucky for you, Warden, we brought the newest model. 819 00:55:39,769 --> 00:55:42,325 Oh! Look at that! 820 00:55:42,405 --> 00:55:45,462 These are not regulation ball and chains. 821 00:55:45,542 --> 00:55:47,508 Replace them. Now! 822 00:55:48,611 --> 00:55:49,677 (SNAPS FINGERS) 823 00:55:54,451 --> 00:55:56,539 And to lift prisoner morale, 824 00:55:56,619 --> 00:55:59,876 the state has required us to give the prisoners these care packages 825 00:55:59,956 --> 00:56:02,890 of toiletries and wholesome magazines. 826 00:56:13,970 --> 00:56:15,725 What about us? 827 00:56:15,805 --> 00:56:18,395 Sorry, but we're all out. 828 00:56:18,475 --> 00:56:21,097 If I weren't already in jail, I... 829 00:56:21,177 --> 00:56:23,666 Ah! The indignity of it all. 830 00:56:23,746 --> 00:56:26,936 Passed over for these larcenous lowlifes. 831 00:56:27,016 --> 00:56:32,520 Remember, any more violations and you'll be the ones wearing prison chains. 832 00:56:38,094 --> 00:56:40,061 - MEN: Whoa! - GUARD: Where do you think you're going? Hey! 833 00:56:47,203 --> 00:56:48,336 (YELLING) 834 00:57:10,360 --> 00:57:12,093 Come on, fellas. 835 00:57:12,896 --> 00:57:14,428 ALL: Huzzah! 836 00:57:18,801 --> 00:57:19,934 (TIRES SCREECHING) 837 00:57:22,171 --> 00:57:23,259 Everyone's gotten away! 838 00:57:23,339 --> 00:57:25,962 Except for these three. 839 00:57:26,042 --> 00:57:29,165 Don't take your eyes off them. We can't lose them, too. 840 00:57:29,245 --> 00:57:31,067 I won't let them out of my sight. 841 00:57:31,147 --> 00:57:32,635 - (LASER BLAST) - (POPPING) 842 00:57:32,715 --> 00:57:33,814 (GASPS) 843 00:57:37,387 --> 00:57:41,244 ANNOUNCER: Welcome to another edition of Gotham Palace, 844 00:57:41,324 --> 00:57:42,723 with your host... 845 00:57:44,093 --> 00:57:45,482 Batman? 846 00:57:45,562 --> 00:57:47,317 Hello, Gotham City. 847 00:57:47,397 --> 00:57:52,155 Your regular host, Miranda Monroe, is a bit tied up at the moment. 848 00:57:52,235 --> 00:57:53,467 (MUFFLED) 849 00:57:56,239 --> 00:57:59,195 So, I thought this could be another job for Batman. 850 00:57:59,275 --> 00:58:03,500 Since taking over Gotham, I've created the perfect city, 851 00:58:03,580 --> 00:58:06,002 and yet I'm still not sated. 852 00:58:06,082 --> 00:58:08,171 I used to think I dress like a bat 853 00:58:08,251 --> 00:58:11,875 to instill fear into Gotham's super criminals, 854 00:58:11,955 --> 00:58:15,211 but recently I've come to realize that, actually, 855 00:58:15,291 --> 00:58:19,048 I just crave attention. (LAUGHING) 856 00:58:19,128 --> 00:58:20,950 (CONFUSED MURMURING) 857 00:58:21,030 --> 00:58:24,554 So, what better place to get that than Gotham Palace? 858 00:58:24,634 --> 00:58:26,523 And to ensure you don't miss a minute, 859 00:58:26,603 --> 00:58:30,159 my Batmen have attached Bat-VHF detonators 860 00:58:30,239 --> 00:58:33,841 to every TV aerial in Gotham City. 861 00:58:34,744 --> 00:58:39,402 If you turn the channel, or worse, turn off the TV, 862 00:58:39,482 --> 00:58:43,506 your sets will explode! (LAUGHING) 863 00:58:43,586 --> 00:58:45,375 ROBIN: Holy shrapnel! 864 00:58:45,455 --> 00:58:49,212 Boy Genius? Catwoman? Alive? 865 00:58:49,292 --> 00:58:52,382 Annoying, but not entirely surprising. 866 00:58:52,462 --> 00:58:54,384 We're here to stop you, Batman. 867 00:58:54,464 --> 00:58:57,086 And just how do you two plan on doing that? 868 00:58:57,166 --> 00:58:59,233 With a little help from our friends. 869 00:59:05,508 --> 00:59:08,831 Then as the milkmaid said when she kissed her cow, 870 00:59:08,911 --> 00:59:11,545 "The show must go on." (SNAPS FINGERS) 871 00:59:23,459 --> 00:59:24,414 (PLAYING TRUMPET) 872 00:59:24,494 --> 00:59:25,748 (PLAYING DRUMS) 873 00:59:25,828 --> 00:59:28,195 (PLAYING BATMAN THEME) 874 00:59:31,534 --> 00:59:33,234 (AUDIENCE CLAMORING) 875 01:00:01,831 --> 01:00:02,930 (SPLAT) 876 01:00:08,237 --> 01:00:09,804 (GROANING) 877 01:00:35,098 --> 01:00:36,819 (FORCE FIELD RINGING) 878 01:00:36,899 --> 01:00:37,965 (MUFFLED SCREAMING) 879 01:01:04,694 --> 01:01:06,827 (GRUNTS AND GROANS) 880 01:01:10,099 --> 01:01:11,332 (GRUNTS) 881 01:01:13,436 --> 01:01:16,459 You poor, delinquent child. 882 01:01:16,539 --> 01:01:20,296 Those villains are all going back to Gotham Penitentiary. 883 01:01:20,376 --> 01:01:24,167 But I'll deal with you and Catwoman personally. 884 01:01:24,247 --> 01:01:26,402 But there will be no death trap. 885 01:01:26,482 --> 01:01:29,672 And I won't be conveniently stepping away. 886 01:01:29,752 --> 01:01:33,076 This time I do it with my own two hands. 887 01:01:33,156 --> 01:01:36,724 MAN: Special delivery for a Mr. Batman. 888 01:01:37,560 --> 01:01:38,848 That's me. 889 01:01:38,928 --> 01:01:42,552 "To Gotham's newest pop star." 890 01:01:42,632 --> 01:01:45,032 (CHUCKLES) I'll drink to that. 891 01:01:47,937 --> 01:01:49,703 (GULPS) Refreshing. 892 01:01:50,640 --> 01:01:53,007 Now, time to deal with you. 893 01:01:54,076 --> 01:01:56,666 (CHOKING) Great Scott! 894 01:01:56,746 --> 01:01:59,869 I've been slipped a mickey. 895 01:01:59,949 --> 01:02:02,572 Batman, are you okay? 896 01:02:02,652 --> 01:02:06,275 Back to... To normal. 897 01:02:06,355 --> 01:02:10,413 Old chum, spell broken. 898 01:02:10,493 --> 01:02:13,116 It seems someone delivered me an antidote 899 01:02:13,196 --> 01:02:17,420 that could neutralize the Bat-anti-antidote. 900 01:02:17,500 --> 01:02:20,556 Holy counter-acting potions! But who? 901 01:02:20,636 --> 01:02:22,759 I'd be more concerned with them. 902 01:02:22,839 --> 01:02:25,005 Quick! Both of you, get behind me. 903 01:02:30,012 --> 01:02:31,745 (ZAPPING AND POPPING) 904 01:02:40,857 --> 01:02:42,790 Holy spontaneous combustion! 905 01:02:45,027 --> 01:02:49,652 Yes, Robin, the duplicates were always molecularly unstable. 906 01:02:49,732 --> 01:02:51,799 Batman, you've saved the day again! 907 01:02:55,738 --> 01:02:59,262 - From yourself. - I don't know how you did it. 908 01:02:59,342 --> 01:03:04,333 The credit must really go to Robin and Catwoman. 909 01:03:04,413 --> 01:03:09,071 She proves that even the most vile, depraved and amoral villain 910 01:03:09,151 --> 01:03:11,974 is capable of redemption. 911 01:03:12,054 --> 01:03:14,477 Gee, thanks, Batman. 912 01:03:14,557 --> 01:03:17,480 While all of Gotham is grateful for her help, 913 01:03:17,560 --> 01:03:19,615 she must still serve her time. 914 01:03:19,695 --> 01:03:20,983 Understood. 915 01:03:21,063 --> 01:03:23,786 Catwoman, thank you for all your help. 916 01:03:23,866 --> 01:03:27,256 I promise to act as a character witness on your behalf. 917 01:03:27,336 --> 01:03:31,360 With good behavior, you'll most likely get an early parole. 918 01:03:31,440 --> 01:03:34,664 After 15 years or so. 919 01:03:34,744 --> 01:03:38,267 Perhaps there's a better way to show your gratitude. 920 01:03:38,347 --> 01:03:39,980 And what would that be? 921 01:03:51,193 --> 01:03:56,519 That'll keep me warm on those cold nights doing hard time. 922 01:03:56,599 --> 01:03:58,365 You'll have to come with us now, ma'am. 923 01:04:01,737 --> 01:04:04,861 It seems everything is back the way it should be. 924 01:04:04,941 --> 01:04:07,296 I still want to know who gave you the antidote. 925 01:04:07,376 --> 01:04:09,376 I'm glad you received the package, sir. 926 01:04:10,246 --> 01:04:11,901 ROBIN: Alfred? 927 01:04:11,981 --> 01:04:15,037 The bond Alfred and I have is unbreakable, 928 01:04:15,117 --> 01:04:18,708 which is why we've had a long-standing arrangement 929 01:04:18,788 --> 01:04:20,543 that if I were ever to fire him, 930 01:04:20,623 --> 01:04:25,581 it would only be because I was under some evil mind control. 931 01:04:25,661 --> 01:04:28,517 And should that happen, I was to prepare an antidote 932 01:04:28,597 --> 01:04:32,355 according to Batman's precise instructions and list of ingredients. 933 01:04:32,435 --> 01:04:34,924 I hope it wasn't too difficult, Alfred. 934 01:04:35,004 --> 01:04:39,729 It got a bit messy at times, but went exactly as planned. 935 01:04:39,809 --> 01:04:42,164 Always one step ahead, Batman. 936 01:04:42,244 --> 01:04:44,211 One step ahead. 937 01:04:44,814 --> 01:04:48,070 One step ahead. 938 01:04:48,150 --> 01:04:51,407 And I've been one step behind since the very beginning. 939 01:04:51,487 --> 01:04:53,509 How could I not see it? 940 01:04:53,589 --> 01:04:54,944 What is it, Batman? 941 01:04:55,024 --> 01:04:56,746 This has all been a well-thought-out 942 01:04:56,826 --> 01:04:59,749 distraction by Joker, Penguin and Riddler. 943 01:04:59,829 --> 01:05:03,386 They knew the Replica Ray was unstable the whole time, 944 01:05:03,466 --> 01:05:07,590 which means they never planned to duplicate Earth. 945 01:05:07,670 --> 01:05:09,592 But we sent them up the river. 946 01:05:09,672 --> 01:05:12,128 No, Robin. Don't you see? 947 01:05:12,208 --> 01:05:14,530 We put their duplicates in jail. 948 01:05:14,610 --> 01:05:16,966 They've been free the whole time. 949 01:05:17,046 --> 01:05:18,768 Holy triple-cross! 950 01:05:18,848 --> 01:05:23,572 And if my guess is right, they knew Catwoman's Batnip would work, 951 01:05:23,652 --> 01:05:28,110 because the Joker spiked it with his own laughing-gas formula, 952 01:05:28,190 --> 01:05:30,413 making it more potent. 953 01:05:30,493 --> 01:05:34,450 Those devilish tricksters needed me as a distraction. 954 01:05:34,530 --> 01:05:36,619 But from what? 955 01:05:36,699 --> 01:05:39,622 Knowing those fiends, it's a crime spree 956 01:05:39,702 --> 01:05:44,560 targeting Gotham's most priceless treasures and irreplaceable artworks. 957 01:05:44,640 --> 01:05:45,728 Well done, Robin. 958 01:05:45,808 --> 01:05:48,497 Exactly what I was thinking. 959 01:05:48,577 --> 01:05:51,500 - The perfect crime. - Almost. 960 01:05:51,580 --> 01:05:52,980 Let's go! 961 01:05:56,986 --> 01:05:59,008 Holy stowaway! 962 01:05:59,088 --> 01:06:02,645 My feline pride won't allow me to let those traitors go unpunished. 963 01:06:02,725 --> 01:06:04,113 I want to help. 964 01:06:04,193 --> 01:06:05,648 Please, Catwoman. 965 01:06:05,728 --> 01:06:07,483 Those venal villains are committing 966 01:06:07,563 --> 01:06:11,454 the biggest heist Gotham City has ever seen. 967 01:06:11,534 --> 01:06:13,189 You'd be in danger. 968 01:06:13,269 --> 01:06:17,493 You do remember they tried to shoot me into space. Yes? 969 01:06:17,573 --> 01:06:21,308 Very well. After all you've done, you've earned the right to join us. 970 01:06:30,920 --> 01:06:32,708 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 971 01:06:32,788 --> 01:06:35,177 Ah. We did it. 972 01:06:35,257 --> 01:06:38,258 Our most perfect plan ever. 973 01:06:39,929 --> 01:06:41,851 Look at our haul. 974 01:06:41,931 --> 01:06:45,332 Priceless treasures and irreplaceable artwork! 975 01:06:46,035 --> 01:06:48,202 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 976 01:06:49,605 --> 01:06:51,994 The first puzzle ever created. 977 01:06:52,074 --> 01:06:56,499 Four thousand years old, and worth a king's ransom. 978 01:06:56,579 --> 01:07:00,569 Ah! That rock's nothing compared to my little nest egg, 979 01:07:00,649 --> 01:07:04,673 encrusted with a million bucks worth of diamonds and emeralds. 980 01:07:04,753 --> 01:07:06,375 - (SQUAWKING LAUGH) - Whoo! 981 01:07:06,455 --> 01:07:09,879 And at last, I finally got my hands on this beauty. 982 01:07:09,959 --> 01:07:12,481 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 983 01:07:12,561 --> 01:07:14,083 A clown painting? 984 01:07:14,163 --> 01:07:15,851 That's worthless. 985 01:07:15,931 --> 01:07:20,423 Oh, Pengi, the value in art isn't in how much it costs, 986 01:07:20,503 --> 01:07:22,258 it's in how it makes you feel. 987 01:07:22,338 --> 01:07:24,360 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 988 01:07:24,440 --> 01:07:27,897 Besides, it will be worth lots once I bump off the artist. 989 01:07:27,977 --> 01:07:30,933 (ALL LAUGHING) 990 01:07:31,013 --> 01:07:34,170 BATMAN: You filthy criminals! 991 01:07:34,250 --> 01:07:37,206 And to think you almost got away with it. 992 01:07:37,286 --> 01:07:40,609 But no one can outsmart Batman for very long. 993 01:07:40,689 --> 01:07:44,747 Egad! He's back to his old, obnoxiously good self. 994 01:07:44,827 --> 01:07:48,050 If we can't outsmart him, then we'd better outrun him. 995 01:07:48,130 --> 01:07:50,519 Hurry, men, or it's curtains! 996 01:07:50,599 --> 01:07:54,090 The prodigal Penguin always comes prepared. 997 01:07:54,170 --> 01:07:55,736 (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 998 01:07:58,207 --> 01:08:00,674 (ALL LAUGHING) 999 01:08:01,677 --> 01:08:04,244 Quickly! To the Whirly-Bat! 1000 01:08:09,185 --> 01:08:11,952 Look, Batman, it's their getaway vehicle. 1001 01:08:17,059 --> 01:08:20,894 A blimp. Unorthodox, but diabolical. 1002 01:08:21,664 --> 01:08:25,421 (CAMERA POSITIONING) 1003 01:08:25,501 --> 01:08:29,391 Whose idea was it to get such a slow-moving getaway car? 1004 01:08:29,471 --> 01:08:31,927 Patience, my quizzical quipster. 1005 01:08:32,007 --> 01:08:33,207 Observe. 1006 01:08:40,216 --> 01:08:44,607 Robin, time to use our exploding Batterangs on those engines. 1007 01:08:44,687 --> 01:08:46,075 Holy Hindenburg! 1008 01:08:46,155 --> 01:08:48,444 If we miss the mark, it'll go up in flames. 1009 01:08:48,524 --> 01:08:50,958 Which is why our aim must be true. 1010 01:08:51,727 --> 01:08:54,795 Ready? One, two, three! 1011 01:08:57,066 --> 01:08:59,299 (ALL GROANING) 1012 01:09:02,104 --> 01:09:04,760 They've blown our engines, you beaked boob! 1013 01:09:04,840 --> 01:09:07,296 Silence! Then we must move the fray 1014 01:09:07,376 --> 01:09:10,533 to where this bird of prey has the advantage. 1015 01:09:10,613 --> 01:09:12,145 (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 1016 01:09:25,527 --> 01:09:26,693 CATWOMAN: They're gone. 1017 01:09:28,264 --> 01:09:30,664 Wrong. They've just gone up. 1018 01:09:34,103 --> 01:09:38,305 BATMAN: Hand over those priceless treasures and irreplaceable artworks. 1019 01:09:39,208 --> 01:09:42,698 You fiends! 1020 01:09:42,778 --> 01:09:47,636 You'll be abstract art once you splat onto the pavement, Batman. 1021 01:09:47,716 --> 01:09:49,883 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 1022 01:09:56,325 --> 01:09:58,025 (GRUNTING) 1023 01:10:00,095 --> 01:10:01,528 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 1024 01:10:06,435 --> 01:10:07,690 (GRUNTS AND GROANS) 1025 01:10:07,770 --> 01:10:09,369 (GRUNTS) Huh? 1026 01:10:10,139 --> 01:10:11,727 (GROANING) 1027 01:10:11,807 --> 01:10:13,329 (SCREAMS) 1028 01:10:13,409 --> 01:10:15,309 I can't believe I'm doing this. 1029 01:10:17,646 --> 01:10:18,879 (GRUNTS) 1030 01:10:23,919 --> 01:10:25,152 Thanks? 1031 01:10:27,256 --> 01:10:29,078 - (BATMAN GRUNTS) - (ALL GROANING) 1032 01:10:29,158 --> 01:10:31,280 (GRUNTING) 1033 01:10:31,360 --> 01:10:32,726 (WHIMPERING) 1034 01:10:34,430 --> 01:10:35,762 (GROANS) 1035 01:10:39,868 --> 01:10:41,668 (ALL YELLING) 1036 01:10:45,007 --> 01:10:47,441 (ALL GROANING) 1037 01:10:49,678 --> 01:10:51,712 (SCREAMING) 1038 01:11:01,523 --> 01:11:03,757 (SQUAWKING LAUGH) 1039 01:11:04,460 --> 01:11:05,525 (GRUNTING) 1040 01:11:06,228 --> 01:11:08,050 (LAUGHS) 1041 01:11:08,130 --> 01:11:09,218 (GASPS) 1042 01:11:09,298 --> 01:11:10,764 (SCREAMS) 1043 01:11:12,534 --> 01:11:15,102 (SCREAMING) 1044 01:11:16,071 --> 01:11:18,705 (GROANS) 1045 01:11:22,478 --> 01:11:23,643 (WHINES) 1046 01:11:26,482 --> 01:11:28,081 (GRUNTS) 1047 01:11:29,551 --> 01:11:31,284 BATMAN: End of the line, Joker. 1048 01:11:35,324 --> 01:11:37,246 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 1049 01:11:37,326 --> 01:11:38,781 (FARTS) 1050 01:11:38,861 --> 01:11:40,482 (WHOOPING) 1051 01:11:40,562 --> 01:11:42,963 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 1052 01:11:44,600 --> 01:11:45,821 - (FABRIC TEARING) - Whoa! 1053 01:11:45,901 --> 01:11:47,823 - (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) - JOKER: Oh! 1054 01:11:47,903 --> 01:11:49,136 (STRAINS) 1055 01:11:49,905 --> 01:11:52,639 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 1056 01:11:53,108 --> 01:11:54,307 Ah! 1057 01:11:58,080 --> 01:11:59,413 (GROANS) 1058 01:12:01,049 --> 01:12:02,705 (MANIC LAUGHTER) 1059 01:12:02,785 --> 01:12:04,985 (ELEPHANTS TRUMPETING) 1060 01:12:05,587 --> 01:12:06,753 (SHRIEKS) 1061 01:12:07,589 --> 01:12:09,156 (TRUMPETING CONTINUES) 1062 01:12:09,925 --> 01:12:11,158 (JOKER MOANING) 1063 01:12:12,928 --> 01:12:15,684 - (HORN BLARING) - Ah! 1064 01:12:15,764 --> 01:12:18,020 (WAILING) 1065 01:12:18,100 --> 01:12:19,788 (GROANS) 1066 01:12:19,868 --> 01:12:22,157 (MOANS) 1067 01:12:22,237 --> 01:12:24,604 CLOWN: Uh. 1068 01:12:28,544 --> 01:12:30,177 Well done, old chum. 1069 01:12:32,247 --> 01:12:36,739 We saved Gotham's priceless treasures and irreplaceable artworks. 1070 01:12:36,819 --> 01:12:39,152 CATWOMAN: Yes. Saved them from me. 1071 01:12:40,489 --> 01:12:43,412 Ta-ta, my stalwart stooges. 1072 01:12:43,492 --> 01:12:47,060 This cat's ready to walk on the wild side again. 1073 01:12:52,568 --> 01:12:57,025 Catwoman, consider the consequences of your actions. 1074 01:12:57,105 --> 01:13:00,529 You know a tiger can't change her stripes, Batman. 1075 01:13:00,609 --> 01:13:04,211 Please. By all that's decent, I beg of you. 1076 01:13:06,281 --> 01:13:09,238 I'll give myself up on one condition. 1077 01:13:09,318 --> 01:13:10,539 What's that? 1078 01:13:10,619 --> 01:13:12,574 We run away to Europe together, 1079 01:13:12,654 --> 01:13:17,746 sip tea in a cafe, and live happily ever after. 1080 01:13:17,826 --> 01:13:21,016 Holy unsatisfying ending. 1081 01:13:21,096 --> 01:13:22,996 And, of course, we kill Robin. 1082 01:13:24,132 --> 01:13:26,433 Catwoman, you know I can't. 1083 01:13:27,936 --> 01:13:29,336 Oh! 1084 01:13:31,440 --> 01:13:34,430 - Give me your hand. - I'm sorry, Batman, 1085 01:13:34,510 --> 01:13:36,932 but I won't be put in a cage again. 1086 01:13:37,012 --> 01:13:38,912 (WIND BLOWING) 1087 01:13:39,882 --> 01:13:41,114 No. 1088 01:13:46,522 --> 01:13:48,255 Catwoman. 1089 01:13:52,294 --> 01:13:53,715 (BLOWS NOSE) 1090 01:13:53,795 --> 01:13:57,297 Loving you was wrong, but I had to do right. 1091 01:14:03,872 --> 01:14:06,773 (JAZZ PLAYING) 1092 01:14:11,046 --> 01:14:13,135 Oh, land's sake, 1093 01:14:13,215 --> 01:14:16,572 what a wonderful birthday you've thrown for me, boys. 1094 01:14:16,652 --> 01:14:18,574 Did we surprise you, Aunt Harriet? 1095 01:14:18,654 --> 01:14:20,242 Did you? 1096 01:14:20,322 --> 01:14:23,612 I knew you two were trying to keep a secret from me. 1097 01:14:23,692 --> 01:14:26,248 But I never suspected it was this. 1098 01:14:26,328 --> 01:14:28,984 There's not much we could keep from you. 1099 01:14:29,064 --> 01:14:31,453 The lengths you went to. 1100 01:14:31,533 --> 01:14:33,655 And I was beginning to think you kept me around 1101 01:14:33,735 --> 01:14:36,325 only for appearances. 1102 01:14:36,405 --> 01:14:39,261 Appearances, Aunt Harriet? How so? 1103 01:14:39,341 --> 01:14:42,331 Oh, simply that the famous Bruce Wayne 1104 01:14:42,411 --> 01:14:45,100 didn't have room for his ward's old aunt. 1105 01:14:45,180 --> 01:14:48,437 But now I know I'm a valued part of the family, 1106 01:14:48,517 --> 01:14:50,973 and I needn't be so insecure. 1107 01:14:51,053 --> 01:14:54,009 And you can put an end to the fishing ruse. 1108 01:14:54,089 --> 01:14:55,655 - I promise I won't... - Sir. 1109 01:14:58,760 --> 01:15:01,383 Uh, you'll have to excuse us, Aunt Harriet. 1110 01:15:01,463 --> 01:15:03,118 Where are you two going? 1111 01:15:03,198 --> 01:15:05,287 The party's just started. 1112 01:15:05,367 --> 01:15:07,456 Why, skeet shooting of course. 1113 01:15:07,536 --> 01:15:09,035 See you later, Aunt Harriet. 1114 01:15:09,905 --> 01:15:11,805 Oh, yes, of course. 1115 01:15:13,408 --> 01:15:14,674 What? 1116 01:15:15,577 --> 01:15:17,544 (BATMAN THEME PLAYING)